"I'm Kiera," she said with an expectant smile as she held out her hand that wasn't carrying a grocery bag. She seemed only very slightly winded after climbing the three flights of stairs to the floor that she and the man she was addressing appeared to share.
The young man with the dark hair and green eyes glanced over her cute dimples and long blonde hair quickly before lowering his gaze to her hand, which he then shook. "Jason," he said simply and quietly.
"You're new here," Kiera noted, releasing his relatively weak shake from her firm-by-comparison grip.
Even though it was a statement, he answered as if it was a question, "Yes."
"Well if you ever need to borrow a cup of sugar or your internet goes out or anything, just hit me up," she said.
He looked up to see that she was still smiling pleasantly. "Yes," he said again.
She nodded and her smile flickered just a bit, but then it returned as she said happily, "See you around then." She raised her hand in a little wave.
He smiled, just for a moment, as he waved back. He started to turn towards his door as she turned towards hers, but he glanced back as she fumbled with her keys before slipping the right one into the lock, turning it, and then leaving it hanging there as she turned the handle while deftly avoiding dropping her groceries. It was only as he was opening his own door that he realized he could have helped her, but even if he had realized it sooner, he probably still would not have. Helping people with their groceries, especially Miss Kiera Jones, was not why he was here.
He continued to see Kiera from time to time over the next weeks. She always smiled pleasantly and gave a little wave. He politely waved back, and usually managed a smile. It was one of the times that he didn't quite smile that she started to look a little worried and asked, "Are you okay, Jason?"
This question took him completely off guard and he didn't have time to veil his surprise. "No, I mean, yes," he stammered. "W-why do you ask?"
She shrugged. "You just looked... uncomfortable," she noted. Then she frowned a bit more and lowered her gauze. "I don't mean to be rude," she said, in the softest voice he had heard her use to date. "I'm sorry."
"No, don't be," he quickly said.
She looked back up at him and managed to smile just a bit. "Okay," she said. She paused for a moment, and just before it became awkward she added, "I know we don't really know each other, but if you ever need to talk to someone..."
"I'll keep you in mind," Jason agreed.
That seemed to cheer her back up a little. She gave a little smile and nod and turned back to open her door.
As Jason entered his own apartment and went inside, he immediately shut the door behind him and leaned against it as his pulse raced and he took deep breathes to try to calm down. "The last thing I want is to talk," he thought. "I really need to stop running into her," he mused. And then his next though was, "Well then why don't I?"
For the next few weeks, Jason took his own advice and made a point not to return home at the same time Kiera did. It seemed their schedules had been somewhat aligned, so he started both leaving and returning home about half an hour earlier. It worked for the most part, until one day when Kiera apparently had decided to switch her schedule up as well.
"Hey, were you on vacation?" he heard her familiar voice behind him ask as he reached for his door.
Jason turned back and cringed just a little as he said, "No."
She looked slightly puzzled. Her happy dimples faded as she cocked her head slightly to the right. "Oh," she said. "I just hadn't seen you in a while."
"Change in my work schedule," he fibbed.
She didn't seem to think anything of it and moved on to say, "Oh hey, I'm having a party on Friday if you want to stop by. No need to bring anything. Just a few friends coming over. Some music, some party games. Should be a good time."
"I need to get up early on Saturday," he lied again.
"Oh." He noted that she had used that word to start her response for a third time now. She didn't seem to notice it herself. She just shrugged and let her dimples return with her smile as she said, "Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me."
"Thanks," he said, and he turned to re-enter his apartment, too nervous to glance back.
The night of the party came and Jason couldn't sleep. It wasn't that the music from across the hall was too loud, though it was loud enough that he could hear. It was that hearing it reminded him of all that life and vibrancy and how much he was missing out on. It was only 10:30, but he had already been laying there for half an hour, having hoped to drift off to sleep before the party really got going. Now, he feared there was little chance of that, so he got up out of bed, threw on a pair of jeans and tennis shoes, and sauntered over across the hall.
His knock on the door was met by a smiling Kiera whose countenance immediately dropped when she saw them. "Oh my gosh, Jason!" she exclaimed. "I'm so sorry. Are we being too loud? I can ask them to turn the music down."
He couldn't help but smile. "No, actually, I decided to come over and hang out, just for a little bit."
She seemed puzzled, again did that thing from earlier in the week where she cocked her head slightly to the right, but then she shrugged it away, smiled and said, "Yeah, of course, come on in."
In the next few minutes, Jason was introduced to several people whose names he immediately forgot. He tried his best to smile politely and shake any hands that were offered him, but he had a hard time not continuing to glance over at Kiera. What was he doing here? Why had he come to this party? This was a dangerous thing he was doing. He knew he was way out of line. But he just couldn't help it.
"Hey, can I offer you a drink?" Kiera asked him after this initial round of introductions that just seemed like a blur. "We've got beer and wine and if you aren't into alcohol, there's lemonade and iced tea as well."
"Tea would be good," Jason heard himself say as if he were an outside observer.
Kiera nodded. "Okay, great," she said. She took one step away and then gestured for him to follow. "This way to the kitchen."
Jason followed her as she navigated her way through the crowd. It wasn't a huge crowd, but big enough to make Jason a little uncomfortable. He glanced around, but saw no one he knew. That was a bit of a relief. As they entered the kitchen, the crowd thinned out, as apparently most everyone was already well supplied with beverages.
As Kiera pulled an empty red solo cup from a stack and poured him a drink from a pitcher she asked, "So, Jason, what do you do?"
Jason froze. It was such a basic, natural question. Why had he not thought about her asking it? And how had he not been prepared to answer? He panicked for that moment, but then realized he was worrying for nothing, as he had a perfectly reasonable answer. He collected himself by the time she turned back around. "Thanks," he said softly as he took the cup from her. Then, more loudly in answer to her question, he said, "I'm an accountant."
She didn't cringe or wince or anything you might expect a pretty woman to do in reaction to such a bland answer. Instead she just nodded and said, "Yeah, my uncle's an accountant, too. Do you like it?"
He shrugged. "It pays the bills."
He hadn't meant for that to be a joke but she laughed as if it was, and it wasn't a forced laugh either. She seemed naturally amused by what he had said. She nodded and smiled and said, "Right on." Then she turned back, grabbed another cup, and poured some tea for herself. "To accountants," she said, raising her glass in a toast.
Before he really had time to think, he found himself raising his cup to meet hers and then pulling it back and taking a drink at the same time she did. He realized he was thirsty, and downed almost the whole cup in that one long drink.
"Wow," Kiera said, not rudely, still smiling, as he came up for air. "You know there's no alcohol in that, right?"
This time he laughed, just a little. "Yeah," he muttered.
"Would you like some more?" she asked.
"Yes, please."
She smiled a bit more as he said please, and she set her cup down as she took his from him and turned to get his re-fill. "So uh, what do you do?" he heard himself asking, again without thinking.
She turned back, smiling, as she handed him his cup. "I'm a graphic designer," she said.
He was actually surprised by that. "No kidding?" he asked.
She laughed. "No kidding," she said. "Why, do I not look like a graphic designer to you?"
He blushed. "No, I mean." He sighed. "This is really wrong of me," he said, "but I've only met a couple graphic designers before and they were, well, dark, like short dark hair, dark nail polish, kept to themselves. I guess I just assumed."
"Not everyone fits into a mold," Kiera said softly, no longer smiling, but not frowning either. She just looked very sincere.
"No, I know. I'm sorry."
She shrugged and smiled again. "Don't even worry about it," she said. "Come on, let's go have some fun." And before he realized what was happening, she had taken him by the hand and was pulling him back out into the main room where the party was at.
It turned out that according to Kiera, "having some fun" consisted first of a trivia game, at which Jason was actually not half bad, then of something called "Cards Against Humanity", during which Jason was very uncomfortable, and then a round of kareoke, in which Jason resolutely refused to take part. But he watched the others take their turns, and couldn't help but note that Kiera was the best by far.
"You rock," he heard himself say as she sat down beside him, regaining her breath after belting out a stirring rendition of "We Are the Champions".
She smiled, and gave a wheezing laugh, still being a little out of breath. "You're too sweet," she said, and he glanced down to realize that she had taken his hand and gave it a little squeeze.
It was two hours later that Jason realized the two of them were still sitting on the couch together though everyone else had gone. They had been talking about Kiera's job as a graphic designer, or rather, Kiera had been talking and Jason had been listening, when suddenly Kiera glanced around and laughed as she noted, "Everyone else is gone!" Then she looked a little worried as she asked, "What time is it? Didn't you have to get up early?"
Jason frowned and felt his heart pounding. Did he tell her the truth, or...? "No, I lied about that," he said.
She returned his frown with one of her own. "Why?" she asked.
He felt his palms growing sweaty and his pulse racing even faster. He never got this nervous in other... difficult situations. Why was he so nervous now? Well, he kinda knew. "I'm just not very good around..." He let the thought trail off.
"Around people?" Kiera asked.
Jason just nodded. He felt like he was going to cry. What was he doing here? This was not where he was supposed to be. He should just get up and leave. But he didn't leave. Instead he just sat there and looked away.
Looking away was not enough, all it did was lead Kiera to touch him, to place her hand under his chin and try to pull him back to look at her. He closed his eyes, not wanting to, knowing he couldn't, but then wanting to. Wanting to so bad. He knew if he opened his eyes he was lost, so he kept them closed as he stood up and turned away from her, tears now welling in his eyes, but not wanting her to see. Why should he care if she would see? "I'm sorry," he managed without completely breaking down. "I can't." And then he opened his eyes and rushed to the door, leaving a stunned Kiera behind him. Needless to say, he ended up not being able to sleep at all that night.
Jason spent the rest of the weekend locked up in his apartment, thankful he had plenty of food to make it through. His biggest fear was that she would come knocking on his door asking if he was okay, but she didn't. He knew she cared, he had seen such goodness in her eyes, so he could only conclude that she realized he needed space. She was good. So good. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all.
By late Sunday night, he had recovered enough that he was confident he could go to work the next day, and return, and do what he knew had to be done.
Monday, instead of coming home early, he stayed out late. He actually went to a bar, something he almost never did, and had a drink alone before returning home. It was just after 9pm when he returned to the apartment building. He checked his watch to make sure the time was right before he took a deep breath and walked in.
Jason didn't walk into his apartment that evening. He walked into someone else's. He walked into a the apartment of a little old lady named Mrs. Vivian Chase who lived on the ground floor because she couldn't do stairs anymore. He walked in in the darkness, where no one would see, right through the wall. Jason walked in because Jason was a reaper, and Mrs. Vivian Chase was the next name on his list. She was dying, tonight, and Jason had to collect her soul.
It was peaceful, in her sleep. He watched her go as she sat in a rocking chair in her bedroom, with a book in her lap apparently having fallen asleep while trying to read. He didn't know in advance how they would die, just where, when, and the name. He was thankful it was peaceful. He wasn't sure he could bear it any other way. Her eyes did open right at the end, but she didn't seem scared. She seemed calm. And she smiled at the young man with the dark hair and the now glowing black eyes as he touched her head and let her go. As her spirit rose, he heard her whisper, "Thank you," and it was the most beautiful thing he could have hoped to hear.
As Jason's eyes returned to normal, he closed Mrs. Vivian Chase's and wiped a single tear from his own. He felt okay. He felt like everything was going to be okay. That was before he turned, left the bedroom and entered the hallway to see to his horror, Miss Kiera Jones standing right there with a novel of her own in her hands and her eyes wide in a horror she didn't even fully yet comprehend.
"You - what the - Jason?"
"Kiera, I, what are you doing here?"
"I come to read to Mrs. Chase," Kiera said. "We're friends. Monday nights, I... You know her? She didn't tell me. I..."
She seemed puzzled as she pushed past him to enter the bedroom. "Kiera, don't," was all he could manage before she entered the room behind him. He should have run. He should have gotten the hell out of dodge. But he didn't. He stayed. Why did he stay? He stayed and he heard Kiera scream. Then he turned and went into the bedroom.
Kiera's eyes were wide with horror, horror more fully realized now, as she reached out a trembling finger and pointed at him. "You!" she exclaimed. "What did you...?!"
"I'm a reaper," Jason said matter-of-factly.
She backed away from him. "Not what I was expecting to hear," she managed as she dropped her book to the floor. He approached her and saw she was about to scream again, so he went incorporeal to cross the distance faster and then touched her lightly on the head. His touch didn't kill, that wasn't how it worked, but it did offer a sense of peace to the dying. For the living, it put them to sleep, just for a few minutes. So as he touched Kiera and let himself become solid again as he caught her before she fell to the ground, he wondered to himself, what the hell was he supposed to do now?
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