Nanowrimo - Overflow

I probably could wrap up my story right here.  It's a nice enough place for it to end.  But if you look back to the beginning, you know this isn't really the end.  It shouldn't be surprising that there are tears still to come.

But first, more joy before we get to the sadness.  Even the joy has some sadness mixed in, but if you focus on the joy, the sadness isn't so bad.

I loved my job.  I got to interact with animals every day.  I got to be the first person those cute kittens and darling dogs saw.  It was with a sad heart that I poked and prodded them, but I was glad when I could make it less painful or when the animal didn't even notice much of what I was doing.  I offered treats to the pets that were well enough to have them and smiled as I spoke to the pet owners about my own adorable Daisy.  I always had her picture on me to show those who seemed interested.  This probably isn't a good thing, but I think I talked more about Daisy at work than I did about Hannah.  In my defense, it makes sense to talk about your animals when you work at a vet's office.  I think that's why I usually liked it so much.

The part I didn't like, the part none of us liked, was when an animal came in who was just so sick there wasn't much we could do.  When they were sick but we could make them well, it was a little sad but overwhelmingly happy when the pet got better.  It was those rare occasions when we couldn't make a pet well that really hurt my heart.  The one that struck me the most was nearly a year in.

It was weeks before Hannah was going to complete her undergraduate work and a lady came in looking very sad with a cat that looked almost exactly like Daisy.  The cat was just a few months older than Daisy, too.  This cat had been getting weaker and weaker over the past several months and the lady had been in to the office before.  At first it hadn't seemed so bad and the vet had kept a cheery disposition and dispensed encouragement and medicine.  But now, it was clear this cat was ready to go.  It was perhaps the third time I had seen a pet that needed to be put down.  You would think the first would have been the hardest, but this one struck me even more because of just how much the cat looked like Daisy.

When I got home that evening, it was all I could do to keep from crying when I told Hannah about it.  "I wish we could have saved him," I said of the cat, whose name was Tigger.

Hannah rubbed my back and said, "It sounds like you did all you could."

I sighed and put my head in my hands.  "You probably could have saved him," I countered.

"It's sweet that you have such faith in me," Hannah replied, "but I can't save any animals yet."

This was when Daisy decided to walk over and announce her presence.  She clearly wanted to jump up into my lap and cuddle.  I was so upset I almost didn't let her, but I realized Daisy was exactly what I needed at that moment, and I leaned back and let her come up.  After all, Tigger may have been gone, but Daisy, my Daisy, the cat I personally knew and cherished was here with me and she was doing just fine.


That whole first year of my job, while I was learning the ins and outs of being a veterinary technician, Hannah was not only studying hard to ace all of her senior year classes, but also fighting for a spot in a veterinary school.  Her number one choice was actually out on the east coast, but her backup plan was local, and was in fact the school her father had attended many years ago.  I couldn't help but hope, secretly, that she didn't get in to her first choice option, though I knew I would have to comfort and console her if she didn't.  I just didn't want to move out to the East coast with her and I also didn't want to stay here and have her be multiple hundreds of miles away.  It was a losing situation for me, but still I supported her and told her that though it would be difficult for me, I would love for her to get into her first choice school.

When she got her answers back and found out she had not been accepted into her first choice, I was more upset than I had expected to be.  I even felt a little outraged.  I had been so worried about her being accepted because I had been sure she would be.  Hannah was an amazing student and did great work with animals, but apparently the problem was that she hadn't done enough work with them in a professional setting.  Her top choice school wanted her to spend a year basically doing my job and then apply again.  Her second choice school, with her father and other local vets to vouch for her, accepted her right away.

I had thought that would be that and Hannah would go to her second choice, nearby, but as the acceptance deadline was drawing near, she walked into the living room where I was sitting with Daisy on my lap and, looking like she had been crying, said, "I don't know what to do."

"About vet school?" I asked looking up.

She nodded as she plopped down on the couch.  "I really had my heart set on this school," she held out the rejection letter, "but this school", she held out the acceptance packet, "will take me right now."

"Well, why are you so resistant to go to your second choice?" I asked.

She flashed me a brief look of anger, but then she softened.  "We've talked about this before," she said, truthfully, "but I just really had my heart set on this other school."  She sighed and looked up at the ceiling and then said something she hadn't said before, "I guess I really just didn't want to take advantage of my father's connections.  I wanted to get in on my own."

I nearly chuckled because I knew what she had just said was ridiculous since she was amazingly talented and had gotten in on her own (an assertion confirmed by the fact that she had applied to two other schools and also gotten in at them), but I didn't chuckle because I knew this really was difficult for her.  So instead, I reached out, gave her shoulder a squeeze and said softly, "You did get in on your own, Hannah.  You earned it.  You worked hard.  This isn't nepotism.  You got accepted at this school because you're awesome.  You got declined from the other school because they're looking for slightly different things, but you're clearly still awesome or else they wouldn't encourage you to apply again next year."

She looked up at me with watery eyes and asked, "Do you really believe that?"

I nodded confidently.  "Yes I do."  And as if to confirm it all, Daisy chose that moment to stand up from my lap and walk over to Hannah's were she curled up and resumed purring away.

Hannah made a little sobbing choking sound as she petted our cat, as I now viewed Daisy, and said, "Thanks, David.  I still don't know if I'm going to accept the one now or get the year of experience first, but I feel better about the idea of going to school now."

I smiled and leaned over to kiss her on the cheek.  "I'm glad," I said.  "If you want to talk again, we can, but ultimately you should do whatever you want."

As I got up to go to the kitchen and get a snack as Daisy purred away on Hannah's lap, I continued to hope that Hannah would stay local while still being upset that her first choice school had put her through this.  I was glad this was Hannah's choice, though, and I was doing my best not to influence her towards my preference.  I hope still that I didn't unknowingly influence her, but I was thrilled when, a couple days later, she decided to go to the local school, creating a situation in which I could keep my job and still see her every day.


Life is funny sometimes.  I had wanted so badly for Hannah to stay at home so I could spend time with her, but once her first year of vet school started, I barely saw her at all.  She made new friends, some of whom had waited for two years before they got into this school.  Hannah would tell you that didn't matter, but even Hannah wasn't perfect and I think it made her feel a little smarter to hang out with girls who had had to wait for what she had been given.  Of course, I couldn't say for sure how Hannah felt since I barely saw her to talk with her about it.

It wasn't just the course work and new friendships that kept us more apart.  Hannah also got a paid internship to help cover the costs of her ongoing education that scholarships could not.  As for me, I started working an evening job so that I could pay off those student loans.  I wanted to be sure I was debt free before I asked Hannah to marry me.  I had originally planned to pop the question after she graduated with an official veterinary degree, but four years felt so long to wait and I was thinking of doing it sooner, as long as I could get rid of those loans.  I just didn't want to put too much pressure on Hannah.

Whatever pressure Hannah put on herself seemed like the right amount, because when I did chance to see her awake, she was happy, and she still managed to get straight As, which was quite a feat.  In fact, getting As seemed easier for her than being at home and awake at the same time I was.  There were many nights when I would get home late from my second job and collapse into bed as Daisy purred me to sleep while Hannah was still studying with her new friends at the library.

I wasn't angry.  Not really.  I was a little frustrated that I had wanted her to be close and now it just felt like torture seeing her so infrequently.  Maybe it would have been better if she did go away entirely, I thought.  But I knew that even the brief exchanges we had were better than nothing.  And besides, we had known this would happen.  We were prepared for it.  The one I really felt sorry for was poor, neglected Daisy, who had had no choice in the matter.

I even remember around my birthday, I had called up my mom, or maybe she had called me, and I had raised the question of her taking Daisy back.  She was shocked and in answer to her question of why, I told her that I felt bad about not spending more time with my beloved pet.  "But Daisy loves you," my mom assured me.  "I'm sure she'd rather spend a few hours with you than the whole day with me."  My mom doesn't really know that much about animals, but it did seem like Daisy continued to love me.  She always expressed joy when I was home, and came trotted up to me as fast as her old bones would take her.  She never seemed angry or dejected.  Those were just emotions I feared she was secretly feeling, though now I tell myself that Daisy wasn't capable of such things.

Even though I tried to feel okay about leaving Daisy alone so much, I was relieved when summer came and I got to spend about 10 times as much time with both Hannah and Daisy.  Hannah had considered taking some summer classes to try to graduate a year early, but thankfully she decided not to.  Even though my mom would insist Daisy loved me the most, it seemed like Hannah was a close second and having her at home several of the days and nearly all of the evenings (she was still interning 3 days a week) made me feel better.  I also got a raise at the vet's office at which I worked and so I was able to cut my evening hours and spend more time at home as well.  It was a great, laid-back summer with my girls, but I couldn't help but notice that at 17 years old, Daisy was really starting to show her age.

She still had no major health problems and seemed to be about as healthy as a cat her age would be expected to be, but she was slowing down to the point where some days she seemed like a rather different cat, but I still loved her and as near as I could tell, she still loved me with all of her little kitty heart.


That entire summer was wonderful.  We considered going on a vacation to somewhere far away, but I didn't want to leave Daisy, so instead we went home to visit my mom and took Daisy with us.  I asked about Chelsea, with whom I hadn't spoken almost the entire year.  I learned from my mom that Chell was working as a waitress at my mom's restaurant!  This was in addition to working at a dog and cat boarding house and spa in town and volunteering at the animal shelter, where she worked with Steve quite a bit.  I felt a little ashamed that my mother and my stepfather were keeping better in contact with my childhood friend than I was, but this seemed to be always how it was with me and Chelsea:  cycles of closeness and distance.

As strange as it felt for me to be back home again for an extended period of time, Daisy seemed to fit right in.  My mom and Steve had a couple cats of their own, but Daisy didn't mind just as long as she got to sleep with me and Hannah every night.  She had been getting older and had a hard time jumping up on the bed in our apartment, but my mom had an air mattress on the floor for us to sleep on so that made things a lot easier for Daisy.

About half way through our stay, I had dinner with Hannah at my mom's restaurant.  I hadn't told Chelsea we were coming, or even that we were in town, but I made sure to go on a night she was working and specifically request her as our waitress.  She seemed really surprised to see me and I sensed that she wanted to give me a hug but knew it wouldn't be proper to do so.  I didn't care if it was proper, so I stood up and hugged her before she could stop me.  Hannah followed suit as well.  Chelsea said she'd love to talk, but it would have to wait until she got off at 9.  So we let our 7pm reservation drag on a bit (there were plenty of empty tables that night or else I would have opened up the room), left a very generous tip, and then went with Chelsea to a nearby ice cream place for dessert.  We talked about how things were going and life in general and then Chelsea, not shying away from a potentially awkward situation, asked with a smile, "So when are you two getting married?"

Hannah blushed, and I probably did a little, too, as I said, "I don't know, probably some day."

Chelsea gave me a knowing look followed by a shrug and changed the subject.  I was just glad that she didn't push it further.

We hung out with Chelsea a couple more times before we went.  I made sure to invite Chelsea over to see how Daisy was doing.  I think Chelsea was a little sad to see how much weaker Daisy had gotten, but she knew what it was like when both pets and people grow older, so she handled it well.  I think it's just weird to not see an animal, or a person for that matter, for very long and then realize how old they'd gotten.  Daisy was getting old and Chelsea was all grown up.  I suppose I was, too.  Those days of her childish crush on me seemed long gone.  Though Chelsea was still a good friend, Daisy and Hannah were the most important girls in my daily life.

After celebrating July 4 (which Daisy had never minded much and still didn't), we said good-bye to my mom and Steve and headed home.  We stopped by Hannah's parents' place one last time (we had spent quite a bit of time with them as well) and then we were back to our apartment in what seemed like no time.  It was strange that we had described this trip as "going home", but now that we got back to our apartment, I really felt like that was our real home.  I had Hannah and Daisy and I couldn't ask for anything more.


After that vacation, it was right back to our jobs, though without Hannah's class schedule we still got to spend a lot of time together.  Things were great all through that summer and then as the school year started up again for Hannah, I noticed Daisy seeming even more lethargic than she had been.  Hannah and I examined her as best as we could and then took her to the vet's office where I worked.  They said that she seemed to have arthritis and her risk of heart disease seemed to be increasing, which was a little odd since cats are more often struck by kidney failure than heart failure, but since I knew this I had been giving Daisy special kidney health food for quite some time.  At any rate, she got some medicines that I could mix with wet cat food once a day and was sent on her way with an otherwise clean bill of health.

After a week or two on the medicines, she seemed a little better, but she still clearly had stiff joints and couldn't run around like she used to.  It was sad, but she still seemed relatively happy.  Though she couldn't jump up on my lap anymore when I sat on the couch watching TV, I would pick her up and she would purr away.

We'd had steps up to the bed for her for sometime, but some nights she preferred to just sleep on the floor.  I got a cat pillow for her so she'd be more comfortable down there, but it made me a little sad that the cat who had always insisted on sleeping in bed with me only did so three or four times a week now.  The one nice thing was that Hannah could cuddle with me more easily now, but I still missed Daisy.

This went on through early December, and then one night, I woke up around midnight to hear a faint meowing coming from the side of the bed.  I turned on the bedside light and looked down to see Daisy looking up at me, seeming weak and tired, but looking up at me with pleading eyes.  She put a paw on the stairs, but didn't move up, so I picked her up and placed her on the bed beside me.  She immediately started purring, and climbed on my chest and curled up just like she had done every night when she was young.  She seemed so happy and I wondered if this was a turning point when she would start sleeping with me every night away.  I stroked her gently for about half an hour and then we both drifted off to sleep.  I woke up the next morning.  Daisy didn't.

I cried a lot that next morning when I realized she was gone, quite possibly more than I had ever cried before.  I probably should have cried at least this much when I learned my dad was dead, but I had hardly known him.  Daisy I had known and loved for nearly 18 years, and now she was gone.  She was gone and she would never be back.  I took a sick day off of work and Hannah took a vacation day, too, to stay home with me.  I hadn't wanted to think about Daisy dying, but I had known in the back of my head I wanted to do something to honor her when she went, so several weeks ago I had looked up pet cemetaries in the area, and now it was time.

They don't have a big funeral for pets, though I suppose someone would if you wanted them, too.  We buried her that same day, just me and Hannah.  They put a marker where she was and I ordered a small headstone to be installed later.  I got a card with her paw print and a small memorial stone for our home as well.  I was glad Hannah was there because I cried a lot.  She barely cried at all.  With her dad being a vet, having pets with shorter lifespans at her house as a child, and with her parents living on a farm with lots of animals, she'd had more personal experience with deaths of beloved animals than I had.  I just thought of the people at my clinic whose pets had been put to sleep over the past two years and realized that I really, truly felt their pain during that day.  The next day was pretty bad too and the day after, but eventually I stopped coming home expecting to see Daisy and stopped seeing her in every cat I saw.  Eventually, I was able to cherish her memory as something happy instead of hating her lose as something sad.  And when that happened, when I was able to realize that even though I had lost Daisy I could still love her, that was when I finally felt ready to ask Hannah to marry me.

Yes, I know I had planned to wait until Hannah graduated, but as her second year of vet school wrapped up, her graduation was still two years away, and so that summer was when I popped the question.  Much to my delight, she immediately said yes.

NaNoWriMo 2014 - Days 16-30

The summer after Freshman year was pretty fun, but could have been better.  My mom suggested I go to some sort of camp and gave me several options.  I chose the soccer camp because I figured it would help me get better at soccer.  Plus, I mentioned it to Roger and he begged his parents to let him go.  It was funny how my mom more or less forced me into the camp and Roger more or less forced his mom to let him into the camp.  "Forced" is a bit of a strong word, I admit, but it makes it sound better when I use a strong word.

Anyway, it was a three week camp and it was a four hour drive from home.  My mom took the day off work and agreed to drive us out, or rather requested that she drive us out.  It was a really long drive, but we played games and had a pretty good time.  Roger had gotten a Gameboy for his birthday, so he was playing with that and showing it to me and let me borrow it for a few minutes.  I asked my mom if I could have a Gameboy (we still didn't have any sort of video game console at our house) and she said, "We'll see."

When we finally got to the camp, I was surprised by how many kids were there.  There were boys and girls, though they would be kept separate for most of the camp.  Our school didn't even have a girls' soccer team, so I hadn't thought much before about girls playing soccer, but there were plenty of girls playing soccer (or at least at a soccer camp) here.  A couple of them that I noticed when we first arrived were pretty cute and I wondered if I might meet girlfriend number three here (I was starting to think about girls a little more now), but I figured I should focus on the soccer and less on the girls.  Roger certainly planned to focus on the soccer.

After my mom helped us get checked in and find our cabin (Roger and I had requested to share a bunk), she gave me a big hug (which was fairly embarrassing but only Roger seemed to see) and drove off, waving good-bye.  We waved good-bye yet.  My mom may have been embarrassing, but she was also really, really nice.  I agreed with Roger when he said, after she had gone, "Your mom is really nice."

Anyway, that first day we just kind-of got settled and the next day was when the fun started.  This camp focused on soccer, but there were other exercises and drills and activities as well.  It was at a legitimate nature park thing that had sports fields on it, so in addition to the soccer, we got to go hiking and do some paddle boats (which were a lot of fun and probably improved my leg muscles) and played some other sports like basketball and tennis.  I was pretty bad at basketball, which I already knew from past gym classes, but I was a little better at tennis than I expected.  I had never played before, so I still wasn't the best, but I won more games than I lost, so that was something.  Roger and I had a very close game in which I just barely came out ahead.  It was a lot of fun, even though it was sometimes a bit too much physical activity for me.

I still kept my eyes out for some of the girls, especially when we had group activities which were twice a week, but I wasn't the one to leave with a girlfriend.  Roger met a girl who was at least as crazy about soccer as he was during the second group outing and she had kissed him twice by the time camp ended.  I had never seen Roger "in love", but it sure seemed to me like he was gushing about this girl.  She even subscribed to the girl versions of one of the same soccer magazines he did.  I was amazed they had different versions of that magazine at all, figuring it would still be the same, and now it seems kind-of sexist to me, but such was life back then, I guess.

Before my mom came to pick us up at the end of camp, Roger had managed to acquire this girl's contact info and learned she lived about two hours from his home.  I suspected that wasn't going to work out very well, but Roger and the girl (I think her name was Sarah) were going to give it a try.  The fact that I'm not even sure what her name was probably tells you about how that worked out.

Anyway, I was pretty happy when my mom came to pick us up.  Camp had been fun and I did make a couple of new friends, though its hard to make friendships started at summer camp really last.  I had enjoyed myself enough to talk about camp for most of the four hour drive back home.  Roger and I were sitting in the back of the car, so I couldn't see my mom's reaction to all the stories and gushing for certain, but I'm pretty sure she was happy considering she never told me to stop talking about camp and she had been the one who suggested I go.

It was the next day after we got back from camp that the "could have been better" part of the summer came in.  This was when my mom told me that she had a boyfriend.

To say I was shocked would be an understatement.  I wasn't angry about her abandoning dad or anything like that.  After all, I barely remembered the guy.  I just couldn't imagine her ever moving on from him.  She had seemed to love him so much.  When I expressed my confusion over how she could have stopped loving dad, she looked a little hurt as she explained that she didn't love my father any less than she had before, but she felt it was time to start dating again.  "If a girl you really, really like leaves you for whatever reason," she said, "you'll be sad for a while and not want to move on, but eventually you'll want to find a girl again."  I thought about "losing" my last two girl friends, but neither of those had been heartbreaking, and the first had been my doing, so I wasn't entirely sure I could relate to my mother.

All of that was simply surprising, though.  What upset me was the feeling that my mom had shipped me off to camp so that she could spend time with this new man without me around.  When I expressed this frustration to her, she insisted that it was a coincidence and that she had met him after I was gone.  "I didn't intend for this to happen," she said.  "I didn't send you away so I could meet men.  I suggested you go to camp because I thought you would like it.  I suppose I had more free time while you were away and more opportunities to meet and talk to people, but I didn't plan that out."  All I heard was that with me away, she was able to meet someone.  I was angry at her for using my absence like that, and I was angry at myself for this feeling like I had been in the way of my mother's happiness.  It was a confusing situation all together.

Meeting my mom's new man a few days later didn't help much either.  He liked me.  He even asked me about video games and when I said I didn't have any system, he told my mom she should get me a Gameboy.  "If that's okay with you," he quickly added.  He was opinionated, but tried not to be forceful.  I had mixed feelings about him.  I certainly liked that he thought I should play video games.  I wasn't so sure about him already suggesting things about the son of a woman he had just started dating.

However, my mom liked her William, or Mr. Percut as I respectfully called him, so I decided to give him a try.  If he was in favor of me getting a Gameboy, I figured, he couldn't be all bad, but what disturbed me the most about him was Daisy's attitude towards him.

Daisy didn't hate the man.  She didn't hiss or growl or claw or bite.  She didn't do those things to anyone unless she was really, really provoked.  She just seemed completely indifferent towards Mr. Percut.  Now, you're probably thinking that's total normal for a cat, but if you've been paying attention, then you know that's not normal for Daisy.  She loved me.  She loved being near me and having me pet her.  She still ran to the door to meet me.  She loved other people too:  my mom, Chelsea, Emily.  All the people who showed interest in Daisy got interest in return.  I admit, she was relatively indifferent towards Roger, but that's because he was relatively indifferent towards her.

With my mom's boyfriend, it was different.  He tried to show an interest in Daisy and be nice to her, just like he was trying to do with me, but Daisy wasn't buying it.  He would pet her and she would tolerate it, but she didn't purr and she didn't rub against his hand like she did with other people.  Okay, maybe she might have purred once.  I remember Mr. Percut getting excited and claiming she had been purring, but his excitement startled her and she ran away and I had never heard the purring.

It's not like Mr. Percut was a bad guy.  He didn't abuse me or my mom or anything like that.  He just seemed to subtly kind-of take charge in get in the way in ways that he may or may not have intended.

Here are some examples:

My mom and I were planning out my Halloween costume that year and he asked something like, "Aren't you too old for Halloween?"

"Almost," my mom said, giving me a little wink and a smile, "but it's one of his favorite holidays."

Mr. Percut shrugged, but then a few minutes later he suggested, "Maybe you could be a lion tamer or something, since you like Daisy so much."  He didn't say this insultingly.  He sounded sincere, like he was really trying to contribute.  But it just reminded me that he didn't know much of anything since the lion tamer thing had been done years ago.  I was polite as I could in telling him this.  He just shrugged again and said, "Well, I'll let you know if I think of anything else."

For Thanksgiving, Mr. Percut insisted on helping my mom prepare the meal, which was very sweet and thoughtful, but lead to the meal not being quite as delicious as it usually was.  My mom was a great cook, and Mr. Percut obviously knew this as he often ate her cooking and praised her for it.  When I complained to my mom after everyone (including Mr. Percut) had gone that some of the dishes weren't as good as usual and asked if those were the ones Mr. Percut had helped the most with, she said, "He's trying to be helpful, David.  You should be more respectful."

It caught me a little off guard because my mother didn't often reprimand me.  I think she was a little ashamed, but it was true that Mr. Percut was trying to be nice.  I just wondered if it actually would have been nicer to not hassle my mom to let him help with the dinner she had made perfectly for as far back as I could remember.

On Christmas, Mr. Percut was of course there again.  This incident was a little different from the previous two.  You might already be able to guess what happened.  Mr. Percut got me a present that was addressed just to me just from him and it was a Gameboy with two cartridges.  I had somewhat been hoping this might happen, as one good thing of my mom dating the man, but when I actually opened the gift, my first reaction was to look at my mom and ask, "Is this okay?"

Before she could answer, Mr. Percut exclaimed, "Of course it's okay!  I wouldn't give you a present without talking to your mother first!"

My mother gave him a little glare, but she looked at me and said, "Yes, of course it's okay," in a much calmer voice than her boyfriend had used.

Later I heard the two of them arguing about it.  Mr. Percut had indeed talked to my mother about the present and she had said it was fine, but she was upset about the way he had lashed out at me when I asked the question.  "It was a perfectly polite and respectful thing for him to do!" my mother said.

"Not very respectful to me," Mr. Percut said.  "I've been trying so hard to connect with him.  I just don't think he likes me."

I let the fact that Mr. Percut knew I wasn't entirely fond of him stew for a couple days and then before the new year, I told my mom:  "It's not that I don't like Mr. Percut.  I'm just unsure about him."

My mom smiled and gave me a hug.  "It's okay, sweetie," she said.  "I'm unsure about him, too."

They continued dating through the new year, but they broke sometime in late January.  My mom never told me who ended it.  I think it could have gone either way.  She seemed sad afterwards, but to me it seemed like the same kind of sad as I had been after I broke up with Emily, so I chose to think she had broken up with him.  Besides, my mom was so awesome, I wasn't sure why he would break up with her unless it was somehow my fault, and I really didn't want it to be my fault.  Though I was somewhat relieved Mr. Percut was out of the picture, I didn't want to prevent my mom from being happy, so I was glad that she wasn't too sad after he was gone and seemed back to normal by the end of February.

I did catch her crying on Valentine's Day that year, but she told me it was nothing.  I imagine she just had been looking forward to having someone to be with on that romantic day.  I knew from TV and movies that some people cared a lot about Valentine's Day.  I hadn't thought my mom was one of them, but I couldn't remember any Valentine's Days she had spent with my father, so maybe she cared about the romance of that day more than I realized, I thought.

As for the romances of others I knew, Roger had given up on Sarah, or whatever her name was, long before Valentine's Day and Chelsea and I had not found new significant others, so the three of us plus a couple of Chelsea's school friends decided to have a "Singles Party" on Valentine's Day.  I think it was something Chelsea read about in a girls' magazine or saw on TV or something and she convinced us to go along with it.  I later discovered that whatever source she had got this from supposed to involve only girls, but Chelsea had insisted Roger and I join because she didn't think the three that she and her single friends would have made was enough of a party.  In some ways it was sad to have a party of people who weren't dating on Valentine's Day, but we were young enough still that it really wasn't that unusual to not have a girlfriend or boyfriend, so we had a pretty good time despite the fact that half of the party consisted of makeovers during a Romantic comedy.  Roger and I just went outside and played soccer during most of that part.

I do remember we also made a little Valentine for Daisy at the party and Chelsea went with me afterwards to help deliver it to her.  I think it was a little heart made of cat treats attached to paper with some sort of edible gel that Chelsea's mother confirmed was safe for cats.  Half of it fell apart when we were carrying it down the street.  Based on how much Daisy enjoyed what was left of it, the bits that fell off probably made some stray cat or raccoon or other animal very happy.  After watching Daisy eat her present, Chelsea thanked me for putting up with her party and promised she would see me at school the next day (since she was now a Freshman and I was s Sophomore at the same high school).  I don't know what came over me as I watched her turn in the doorway to say that good-bye, but I very nearly leaned forward and kissed her.  After she left, I was really glad I hadn't, though.  That would have been a disaster, I thought, and I really did not understand what made that thought would pop into my head, that thought of taking such a bizarre action with a girl I had determined was my friend and nothing more.

I put that temporary insanity out my mind.  Chelsea seemed none the wiser, and things continued on much as they had when she and Roger had first moved in, except that we were older and more mature.  Also, Roger and I could both drive now.

I probably should have mentioned earlier that I had been learning how to drive for nearly a year.  I had turned 15 during Freshman year, after all.  Roger had turned 16 around the time I had turned 15 so he had already been driving for about a year.  Technically, he could have drove us to the camp that past summer, but my mom wanted to see us off and his mom seemed nervous about letting her son who had only been driving alone for about 6 months drive for the full four hours.  But by now, another 6 months had passed.  Six more months of Roger's driving experience.

I hadn't gotten quite the jump on driving that others had, meaning my mom had initially delayed in getting me my permit, and then got a bit distracted with the whole dating situation, so I ended up not taking the driving test right when I turned 16, but by the end of February, I was good to go.

I remember showing my license to Chelsea and she was so excited!  She told me that Roger often refused to take her places, but she was sure I wouldn't be like that.  I kind-of wanted to be like that, to be independent and not be a chaufer for a girl who was nice but not my girlfriend.  But as I had no girlfriend of my own, I ended up serving as Chelsea's chaufer on many occassions after all.  She liked to go to the mall sometimes, but more often she wanted to go to the pet shelter at which she had started volunteering.  I hadn't even known she was doing that.  She said that Roger used to drop her off, but now I could.  I said no way was I just dropping her off.  I would volunteer too.  She was beyond thrilled by this, and she had a great time.

Unfortunately, I only volunteered a couple times before soccer season started.  The camp that past summer must have helped or something because I managed to make it onto the varsity team!  That was something that Roger was thrilled about.  "I may have put a good word in with the coach for you," he said.

I thought the idea of Roger influencing the coach that he didn't seem to know much better than me was a little silly, but he was a year older than me so maybe he had more sway than he thought.

It was great to be on the Varsity team, but I was sad to tell Chelsea that I would have to cut back on the volunteering that I had literally just started until summer rolled around.  "I guess I just didn't think it through," I told her.

She frowned, but she seemed to understand.  "I guess I didn't think about that either," she said.

So Chelsea found another way to get to the shelter about half of the time.  I still came with her when I could.  And she always came to the soccer games when they were at home.  She cheered on Roger a lot more than she cheered on me, but that was probably because Roger played about four times as much as I did.

Despite not getting to play a whole lot on the soccer team and missing out on lots of the shelter work, I still had a good rest of the year and when summer rolled around again, I had all the time in the world to help at the shelter.  I told my mom that I would rather help at the shelter than go to a camp again.  She said it was okay with her.

I think things worked out pretty well for everyone involved, because that summer was when I met Steve.

Steve was a volunteer at the shelter.  He was in his late thirties, about one year younger than my mom, and he loved animals.  He had two cats, a dog, and two birds at home, he told me.  He showed me and Chelsea pictures.  He was amazing with animals, too.  He was like a dog and cat whisperer.  Not every animal responded well to him, I admit, but most of the animals we worked with at the shelter seemed to love Steve.  He mostly worked with the dogs, teaching them to obey basic commands like "sit" and "stay" and "come", but he worked with some cats, too.  One cat even trained to do the high five trick I had attempted with Daisy so long ago!  Steve gave me a few pointers and I went home to try it out.

To my delight, Steve's advice worked!  Within a little over a week, I could get Daisy to give me a high five in exchange for a treat.  She started even doing it when I didn't ask for it, thinking she could just get a treat whenever.  "How did you finally get her to do that?" my mom asked.

"Steve," was my simple answer.  "He works at the animal shelter and he's great!"

My mom gave a little nod and went on with whatever she was doing in the kitchen.  It wasn't long afterwards that I realized I could have sold Steve a lot more back then, but I wasn't thinking about what he had to offer my mom at the time.  I was just thinking about how cool I thought he was.

It was about 6 weeks into my summer of volunteering that I learned that Steve's wife had died in a car accident eight years before.  I had already known he had no kids, but now that he had opened up a little about his wife, and he also admitted that hadn't remarried and had hardly dated since.  I think after his soul outpouring he shook his head and said something like, "I don't know why I'm telling you kids this."

But I knew why.  It was so I knew I had permission to set him up with my mom.  I came up with a brilliant idea.  It was brilliant in its simplicity.  I asked my mom to come to the shelter with me one day soon after that.  I told her there was this adorable cat she just had to see.  The truth was, I found just about all the cats at the shelter adorable.  The truth behind the truth was that  I wanted her to meet Steve.  I might not have told her this.

So we went to the shelter and started looking at cats and then I casually glanced in the direction of the dog area (where I already knew Steve would be working today) and, trying to act spontaneous said, "Hey, Mom, there's Steve.  He's the one who taught me how to train Daisy.  Let's go say hello!"

My mom gave me this kind-of sly look that I chose to ignore and I led her off to meet Steve.  "Hey Steve, this is my mom," I told him once I got his attention and he came out to say hello.  "The two of you have a lot in common!  You both own at least one cat and both of your spouses died!"  I was not one for tact back then.

My mom exclaimed, "David!" so loudly that everyone nearby turned and looked at us.  Steve looked very uncomfortable.  To be honest, I think I mostly knew what I was doing and that it wasn't cool.  I just hoped with all of my heart that they would get over it and bond over what an enormously rude little dork I was.  It seemed to get off to a good start after that awkward moment because my mom let out a deep sign and then turned to Steve and said, very apologetically, "I am so sorry.  He isn't usually like that."

Steve gave a small smile and said, "I know.  I work with him practically every day he's here.  He's usually such a good kid."  He really emphasized the "usually" and gave me a glare that I could tell he as trying to make angry but came out more amused.

"Well, now that we're off to an extremely awkward start," my mom said, "I would like to thank you for putting up with my kid.  He really enjoys coming here, and he loves playing with Daisy with that new trick with the paw shaking.  I think she might get fat on all the treats she gets from that one."

Steve laughed and rubbed the back of his head nervously.  "Well, I wouldn't want to be responsible for that, but I am glad that he enjoys working at the shelter."  There was a lull of silence for a couple seconds and then Steve quickly added, I was pleased to observe, a bit too anxiously, "You know you could volunteer here too if you wanted.  If you're even half as good with the cats as your son is, you'll do great."

My mom smiled and shook her head, "I might from time to time," she said, "but I'm usually pretty busy.  I'm the head Chef at La Voure."

Steve's eyes lit up.  "You're kidding?" he exclaimed.  "I love that place!"

This took me by surprise because La Voure was fairly fancy, at least for dinner, but I was happy to hear there was yet another connection, a more mundane one, that my mom and Steve shared.

"Oh yeah?"  My mom smiled and a look of slight teasing came over her face as she asked, "What's your favorite dish."

Steve blushed and answered as he rubbed his head again, "Well, I usually go there for lunch since it is a bit pricey for dinner, and I usually get the Mushroom Pappardelle."

My mom kept smiling, so that was good.  "That isn't my specialty," she said, "but it's pretty good.  Come by for dinner sometime and I'll make you my favorite at a 10% discounted price."  There was another brief lull and then she added, "You can bring a girlfriend or someone if you like, too."

I think Steve caught on to my mother's not so subtle queue because he rather quickly said, "Oh, I'm not seeing anyone.  Is it okay if I come alone?"

"Absolutely," my mom said.  Then she turned back to me and said, "Maybe David can accompany you."  She winked at me when she said that.

"Yeah, that would be fine," Steve agreed.

I was grinning ear to ear when we left the shelter.  "You must be very proud of yourself," my mom said.

"Yeah, I am," I said.

"I just hope you aren't disappointed if Steve and I don't hit it off," she said.

I laughed.  "Mom, you used to try to teach me about girls, " I retaliated, "but now I have to tell you that I'm pretty sure you already hit it off."


Well, it turns out I was right.  My mom and Steve had and did hit it off.  I was so thrilled.  My mom made him a lovely dinner for which he paid and then she invited him over sometime later for a dinner for which he wouldn't have to pay.  She even came to volunteer at the shelter a few more times.  She wasn't as into the dogs as Steve was, but that was okay.  She played with the cats with me and Steve poked in to "check and see how you're doing" from time to time.  It was pretty cute.

I was just glad my mom had someone in her life who wasn't all pushy like her first boyfriend I had know had been.  And I was selfishly glad that it was someone I had chosen for her.  I remember towards the end of the summer, with things going so well, we had a BBQ over at our house and Steve was there and so was Chelsea and her family.  I just leaned back on the patio next to Chelsea and said, "You know, I could probably find someone to set you up with, too."

Chelsea rolled her eyes and said, "I don't need your help to find a man, thank you very much."  She was getting a little lip on her as we got older.

Really, I wasn't all that interested in setting Chelsea up with someone.  I was just trying to convince myself that, after rejecting her all those years ago, I wasn't starting to develop feelings for her now.  Watching my mom and Steve was a welcome distraction in some ways, but it also left me occasionally imagining myself and Chelsea in their places.  I didn't understand what was wrong with me.

Fortunately, the new school year started and Chelsea proved true to her word that she didn't need my help finding a boyfriend.  She latched right on to a very blond foreign exchange student from Norway.  I cautioned her that this was obviously not going to last since he was going back to Norway at the end of the year, but she just shrugged and said, "We both know that, but it will be fun for now."

The part of me that still viewed Chelsea as a little sister hoped they wouldn't be having too much fun together.  Oh, okay fine, the part of me that was fighting off the hints of an attraction to the more grown-up Chelsea was hoping the same thing.  But I truly was glad that she had someone so that I didn't have to fight this urge to ask her out myself.

Meanwhile, I focused more on the relationship between my mom and Steve than on finding a girl of my own.  Just about every day, perhaps every time I saw my mom, I would ask her how things were going with her and Steve.  I think this may have led to the first time in the history of forever that a mother has said to her high school aged son, "You really, really need to start dating yourself."

My quip of a response to that was, "How and why would I want to date myself?  That sounds really boring."

My mom threw a pillow at me and when I ducked out of the way, it nearly hit a startled Daisy.  I frowned at her and she looked at Daisy and said, "Sorry, sweetie."  I decided to agree with her that Daisy was a sweetie and went over to comfort and cuddle my cat and put Chelsea and my mom and Steve and everything else out of my mind for a short while.


Another thing, or rather adorable pussy cat, that helped me take my mind off matters of human love was Daisy.  I always loved Daisy.  I always spent time with her.  But I admit that ever since high school started, I hadn't been quite as devoted to my cat.  I still talked about her a lot, and I obviously liked to play with her as demonstrated by the whole teaching her to shake hands thing, but I was often focused on other things like homework or soccer practice rather than on Daisy.  I decided during this, my Junior year of high school, that such behavior simply would not stand.  I didn't sacrifice my grades for Daisy or anything.  At least I didn't sacrifice them to the point of getting anything below a B.  But I did try to make more fun to play with her or to just sit around and pet her (which fortunately I could often do while doing homework at the same time).

I even remember messing around and trying to get Daisy interested in my now aging Gameboy.  She was not impressed.

When I realized just how quickly Halloween was approaching, I decided, without my mother's influence thank you very much, that I was finally too old to go trick or treating.  Instead, I decided, I would stay home and hand out candy with my adorable cat whom I would dress up like something amazing.  The something amazing ended up being a fish.  I thought it was hilarious.  Chelsea thought it was hilarious, too, when she brought her younger siblings around to see it.  Both Roger and my mom just rolled their eyes, but when Steve, who was hanging out with us for Halloween, said he thought it was cute, my mom at least smiled a little.

Okay, so I can't escape talking about significant others of others completely.  It's just a part of life.  And life goes on, so they say.

I loved Daisy for tolerating the Halloween nonsense I put her though.  I had bought some special Halloween themed cat treats that looked like candy corn just for the occasion to give her as a reward afterwards for tolerating me.  Roger wanted to feed some of them to his youngest siblings, but Chelsea told him that was terrible and that she wouldn't let him.  I just smiled at their banter as I fed Daisy a few more treats than I probably should have.  Fortunately, she didn't throw up as far as I know.

As much fun as I could have with Daisy, she was getting older.  She was just over 10 years old now, which according to my vet was the equivalent of being 60 if she were a human.  I had a hard time believing that, though, considering that Daisy sure ran around and played a lot more than my 60ish year old grandma did.  But she did also sleep a lot more than I remembered her doing just a few years ago, and did seem to like to go to bed earlier and also wake up earlier than she used to, which is something my grandma claimed she did, so who knows.

Despite our growing age difference, Daisy was still my friend and my companion.  She was a huge part of my life, and I don't think I ever even thought about the fact that one day, I would have to let her go.

On a brighter note than thinking again about the lose of my cat, Christmas was great for Daisy that year.  Steve, after politely asking both me and my mother if it was okay, got a special holiday stocking for Daisy.  It was shaped like a fish, which I thought was the best in light of Daisy's Halloween costume that year.  We even managed to coax, with only a slight amount of stuffing, her into the stocking to take a photo.  She was such a good sport.  "You're going to drive that cat mad," my mother said.

"If she isn't there already, she'll probably never get there," Steve said with a smile.

I laughed, even though it was somewhat of an insult to me since I would have been the one driving her towards insanity.  Whatever.  It was funny and I knew how Steve meant it.  My mom did, too, because she smiled back at him.

We filled Daisy's stockings with a new bag of treats and a couple of toys and a cat bed that I was pretty sure she would never use since she slept on top of me all the time, but Steve suggested we could keep it around just in case and my mom nodded.  I hadn't realized it at the time, but he was talking about when I went away to college in a year and a half and would no longer be around for Daisy to sleep on.  I didn't want to think about that parting then and I'm not going to talk about it now!  Not yet anyway.

For my Christmas, I got a laptop from my mother, which was amazingly awesome considering how new a concept a laptop was, and some books I had been mentioning I'd like to read from Steve.  "Santa" also got me one new game for my practically out of date Gameboy.  I think "Santa" was that 60ish year old grandma of mine trying to be hip or cool or whatever.  It was a nice gesture, and I'm pretty sure I played the game at least a bit, though I can't remember now what it was.

To top off the very nice Christmas we had, my mom made a delicious Christmas meal, just like she did every year.  Steve didn't even get in the way (unlike that other guy I've decided not to name any longer at Thanksgiving those years ago).  Steve just brought cookies he had baked at home.  He did go a bit overboard by having us decorate them like we were kids, but it actually ended up being a lot of fun, especially when Daisy did something very uncharacteristic and jumped up on the table to see what was going on and we had to chase her down while spilling frosting everywhere.  Steve ended up accidentally wiping frosting on my mom's face and then kissing it off.  I wrinkled up my nose and said, "ewww!" but I was actually glad to see them getting along.  I hadn't been 100% sure that my mom was as much on the Steve bandwagon as I had been.  Like I said before, I had been trying to be less involved and not worry about it so much, but it was still nice to see her so happy and see that Steve, my main man, was contributing to that.  I guess in that particular case, Daisy helped too.  But she was always making everyone happy.  That's just the awesome kind of cat that she was.


It seemed like Christmas had barely passed and I was already back at school and turning 17.  As a birthday present to myself, I did what my mom had been urging me teasingly to do and got a new girlfriend.  I might have started dating this girl sooner because she was smart and cute and funny, but I had a hard time getting over the fact that she had the same name as my cat.  That's right:  my new girlfriend's name was Daisy.

I asked her out the day after my birthday, so technically she was a belated birthday present to myself.  I figured it would be weird to ask her out on my birthday and I didn't want to make things any weirder.  I might have risked it if the whole name thing hadn't already been weird.  With human Daisy, I broke the rule of honesty that Roger had wisely imparted to me several years before.  I didn't tell her about cat Daisy.

The other thing I should mention was that human Daisy was a Freshman and, as far as I am aware, never went to my same school before this year.  This is why I didn't meet her and have this awkwardness about her having the same name as my cat before.  And even when she was at my same school, I didn't actually meet her until that January after Christmas break.  We were taking a current events elective together:  her because she was genuinely interested in current events and me because I needed to fill a social sciences elective and figured it would probably be good to know what was going on beyond my tiny bubble of the world.  It soon became clear that human Daisy knew a lot more about the world than I did, which was what first intrigued me about her.  I didn't talk about politics with anyone, but in this class we talked about it as much as we could without causing an uproar.  Human Daisy always made well thought out points.  I was pretty surprised when I learned she was a Freshman, and that made me admire her even more.

She was definitely cute, too.  She wore skirts almost every day.  And as for humor, some of her jokes I didn't get, but the ones I did get were pretty good.

All of this combined to me wanting to ask her out, but waiting until I was over the whole same name as my cat weirdness to do so.  I'd like to think that she accepted because she liked me, too, but in retrospect, I think it might have mostly been because she was flattered to be asked out by an upper classman and would have said yes to any number of other guys in my class or Roger's class.  This isn't meant as an insult against her.  I just use it as an excuse for... well, let's talk about the good stuff first.

The good stuff was that since I had a car, I was able to take human Daisy out to places.  She liked that.  When I first asked her out, I asked her out for dinner.  I had considered asking her to my mom's restaurant, since I got a hefty family discount, but I was afraid that would be too pretentious, so we went to a less upscale Italian spot instead,  I reasoned that if she liked that food, she would love the food at my mom's restaurant should things progress to the kind of relationship that merited a trip to a fancier spot.  By the way, I keep calling it "my mom's restaurant, but for the sake on honesty, I should say that she didn't own the place but was the head chef.

And for the sake of honesty now, though it doesn't make up for dishonesty in the past, I didn't tell human Daisy about cat Daisy on that first date.  I also didn't tell my mom about human Daisy before that first date.  I wanted to make sure things went okay and that we were going to go out again before I said anything to my mom.  And even after things did go well, she wasn't the first one I told.  I talked to Roger first instead.

His initial reaction, much to my annoyance, was to burst out into laughter.  "You're dating a girl who has the same name as you cat?" he exclaimed rolling back and forth on the couch in a much exaggerated hysteria.  "That's gotta be confusing!  Or maybe you're just into animals more than I thought!"

I punched him in the arm.  He said, "Ow!" and then sat up and rubbed the laughter tears from his eyes.  "I'm sorry man," he said, trying to get more serious but still smiling in his amusement.  "You know what I'm going to say, though.  You can't just not tell her about your cat.  I mean Daisy is a big part of your life."  He paused for effect and then added, "And it sounds like you want Daisy to be, too!"  He started laughing again and I just rolled my eyes.

As I left the living room, I found that Chelsea had been eavesdropping on our conversation.  In the moment I saw her, this just added to my annoyance, but then Chelsea looked at me, totally serious, and said, "It really isn't that big of a deal.  She won't be bothered by it if she likes you.  And as for Roger, I guarantee he'd date a girl named Lily if he was attracted to her even though she would have the same name as our dog which is a lot more awkward and strange than a girl having the same name as a cat."

I gave a little smirk and couldn't help but add, "Yeah, and Lily is probably a more common person's name than Daisy is too so it just might happen to Roger at some point."

Chelsea smiled.  "Yeah, what kind of foolish child would name a dog Lily after all?"

I felt a little bad when she said that, but she was smiling, so I decided I didn't have to apologize.  Instead I said, "Thanks, Chell.  You always make me feel better."

She looked slightly sadder even though I had said something nice and just responded, "Any time."  Then she walked into the living room where her brother had finally quieted down.  I glanced after her and wondered for a split second if she was starting to have feelings for me again now.  But that was silly.  She had a boyfriend of her own and now I had a girlfriend, too.  I decided, yet again, that Chelsea and I would not be together as more than friends.

So lets get back to the telling Daisy about Daisy situation now.  I have to admit, my reaction to when I think about the whole thing now isn't that far off from the one Roger had as described above.  But when it was all happening, it was quite a concern of mine.  I so dreaded telling human Daisy about cat Daisy, in fact, that it was three more dates before I brought it up, and only after I finally got the nerve to tell my mother I had been dating a Daisy.

At first, my mom was annoyed that I hadn't told her about my new girlfriend, but when I told her about how awkward the name situation was to me and how Roger had laughed about it, she seemed to soften up.  "It really isn't that big of a deal," she said, echoing Chelsea's words from a couple weeks before.  "Maybe if you can accept that for yourself, it will be easier to tell her and you won't be surprised when she just shrugs it off."

As much as I trusted Chelsea, I was at that stage where I didn't 100% trust my mom, but still, I figured if they both said the same thing, it must be true.  Really, I think it was also possible that human Daisy could have been more like Roger than like Chelsea and my mom, but since I don't think I would date a girl who was like Roger it makes sense that she reacted my more closely to how my mom and Chelsea thought she would.

I admit, her reaction was not laughter-free.  She started out with a little giggle, at which felt my face grow hotter as I was probably turning red.  But then she said, "I think that's adorable.  You know that now I have to meet your cat, right?"  I smiled.  It was the best response I could have asked for.  And when Daisy did meet Daisy, it went like it always did when Daisy met someone nice:  they got along great!  That last "Daisy" in the previous sentence was supposed to refer to the cat, but really it could refer to either.

Okay, so that dishonesty turned out not to be the undoing of our relationship.  Human Daisy and I were pretty happy together for the time being, and cat Daisy continued to seem pretty satisfied, too.


I think what human Daisy liked most was that I could drive her around.  She was really polite and tried not to be too pushy, but she had no older siblings, just a brother who was five years younger than she was, and her parents were some sort of political activists, which explained why she was so interested in current events, so they were often busy and couldn't drive her around.  But due to their trusting nature or my natural charm or something, they trusted me to be both their daughter's boyfriend and chauffer.  Meeting Daisy's parents was a whole other story.  We'll get to that in a bit.

The things that Daisy liked to go to were things I weren't super interested in but felt I should be more interested in.  They were cultural things like art shows and symphony concerts.  The concerts were sometimes a bit on the pricey side, at least for a high school kid, but we also went to free shows and when the shows did cost money, Daisy offered to go dutch.  For the first such show we ever went to, I told her I would make up for making her pay for her own ticket by taking her out to a really nice dinner.  This was when I took her to my mom's restaurant and was thrilled to hear her rave about how great everything was even before I told her that my mom was the head chef.  It's possible she already knew my mom was the head chef, since Daisy was the kind of person who would have read some foodie article and made the connection, but even if she had known and kept that a secret, she seemed to genuinely enjoy herself.  The concert was pretty good, too.  I realized that classical music wasn't all that bad, though I do still have trouble staying focused during particularly slow pieces.

Another reason Daisy liked going to the concerts was because she played the cello.  I had never been aware of knowing a cello player before.  Apparently our school even had a strings group about which I knew nothing, but I soon knew that Daisy was in it!  I went to a few concerts and from my basically non-existent musical knowledge, it seemed quite good.  There was more than one cello player and even being able to tell which notes came from a cello at all was difficult enough for me without trying to pick out which notes were Daisy's, but since the whole thing sounded pretty good, I always just told her that she sounded great.

All in all, I think that the things Daisy introduced me to improved my life.  I'm not sure that she could totally say the same of me, but at least I had an adorable cat who shared her name.  I think at the very least, she would say that plus my ownership of a car made our relationship worth it.

Even though Daisy was a bit more classy than me, we did get along pretty well.  She got along well with my mom, too.  The two of them meeting was no problem at all.  It was my meeting of Daisy's parents that was a little awkward.  Daisy was very tactful in her political views, and in fact she hadn't yet fully decided what they were.  This was less the case for her parents.  Luckily, they didn't drill me about my own views, which was great because I was much further behind Daisy in figuring out what those even were, but they did spend most of the dinner talking about their views and causes and rallies.  Daisy kept looking at me apologetically and trying to bring up something more mundane than school, but it wasn't very successful.

"Your parents seem nice," I told her afterwards, "but do they always talk so much about all that... stuff?"

She clasped her hands and looked down nervously.  "I'm sorry," she said.

"No don't be!" I quickly assured her.  "It's not your fault... I just figured it must be tough trying to form your own opinions."

She looked back up and smiled.  Her eyes sparkled with hope or hints of tears or something.  "It's really sweet how you think of me," she said.

I responded to that by leaning forward and kissing her.  It wasn't our first kiss, but it was probably the best one to date at the time.  I didn't even care that her parents were probably watching us.  They seemed to care more about their political causes and rallies anyway.


As my relationship with human Daisy progressed, my mom's relationship with Steve seemed to be going pretty well, too, at least as near as I could tell.  He really enjoyed the company of not just my mom, but of me and of both Daisies (cat and human) as well.  I remember that he would go to many of my soccer games and if I should glance up at the stands, I would see him and my mom and Chelsea and Daisy all cheering together, though Chelsea in particular was cheering for Roger and for her boyfriend as well.  I don't know if this image of my happy family and friends bolstered my spirit and the spirit of the soccer team or what, but we were quite stellar that year.  We got to the state championships and, though we didn't win the final game, we still came home with a pretty sweet second place trophy.  It was the best our school's team had done in something like 15 years.

Even off the soccer field, watching my mom with Steve made me feel warm inside.  I loved my mom, though I still wasn't to the point of telling her so, and I liked Steve a lot and I especially liked to see them together.  I remember how, right after finals at school, my mom and Steve nervously sat me down for a chat.  At first, I was afraid they were breaking up, but in fact, the opposite was true:  Steve was moving in!  They had thought I would be uncomfortable about this, but I was thrilled.  My mom had to give me a talk about how living together was a very adult thing and how I might one day consider it, years in the future, after I had met someone very special.  I was just thrilled she considered Steve special enough.  Like I said, I liked the guy a lot.  I think cat Daisy sensed the joy in the air as that discussion took place, because she marched over and started rubbing against all of our legs and purring so happily.  It just made it even more perfect.

While my mom and Steve got closer over the summer, circumstances drew me and Daisy, my girlfriend, apart.  Her parents were going on some sort of speaking tour or something and they were taking Daisy and her younger brother with them.  I missed Daisy, yet Steve's present in my house was welcoming and I probably could have just bummed around the house and helped at the animal shelter all summer like the summer before.  But this summer, the summer after my junior year, with my girlfriend away and not much terribly productive to do with my time, I decided to get a summer job.

My mom seemed very happy about this decision.  She had never pressured me to get a job.  She might have had I not decided, on my own with Chelsea's help, to volunteer at the animal shelter the summer before, but now that I decided, again mostly on my own, to get a paying job, she expressed what a great idea she thought this was.  She hinted that I could probably get a job as a bus boy or dishwasher at her restaurant pretty easily.  I considered this, but in the end, I just went for the classic McDonald's gig.

As a result, what could have been a fairly lazy summer, turned into a combination of working, volunteering (still at the animal shelter), training for my final year of high school soccer, and starting to think about and research colleges, which also meant starting to think about what I wanted to do with my life.  It didn't take much thinking to settle on wanting to do something with animals, but the question was what exactly.  By the end of the summer, I figured I could plan to major in biology and sort out more details later and I started to look for colleges that had good biology programs at various levels of admissions difficulty.  Steve helped me with this a lot since he was a vet technician and knew what to look for when it came to animal sciences.  That was just one more reason why it was really great to have him around that summer.

It turned out that working at McDonald's was the least enjoyable part of that summer, but even that wasn't so bad.  It was somewhat interesting to see the process behind America's favorite fast food, and I did think it was kind-of fun to be a part of it.  I would have preferred not to have a job, though, if only I could have gotten the same amount of money for doing so.  I didn't mention this before, but the money was the main reason I wanted the job.  My mom continued to give me an allowance all through high school, but I wanted to have some extra spending money so that when Daisy came back and wanted to go to the next great concert, I could surprise her by paying for both of our tickets instead of just my own.


I remember being so excited when Daisy came back from her trip with her parents.  We arranged to meet up at a park near her house.  I was grinning ear to ear when I saw her.  She seemed happy, but not overly so.  This got me a little down.  She had this look on her face like she was glad to see me, but she'd rather be somewhere else.  When I told her about my summer job and surprised her with a pair of tickets I had purchased to an "end of summer" concert playing the week before school started, she smiled a little bigger and said, "That's so sweet."  But then after taking her ticket from my outstretched hand, she added, "But you didn't have to do that."

We went to the concert and had a great time.  Daisy seemed to be warming up to me again, if that's the right way to describe it.  It's strange how humans have their ups and downs when cats, at least my cat, are fairly constant in how they feel about you.  Don't get me wrong, cats can definitely have mood swings, but they are brief, lasting minutes or even seconds, rather than having a slow recovery over days.

Though I was a little concerned about what was going on with Daisy, I didn't have the attention available to focus fully on it.  Roger was going away to college this year and I wanted to help him pack and prepare and everything.  Since Roger had lots of friends on the soccer team, I'm not sure I was really needed, but I wanted to help and I wanted to somehow be able to thank Roger for being my friend all these years.  I realized I wanted to thank his father, too, for taking me fishing and to baseball games and all the fatherly things he did for me when I was young.  I realized now what he had been trying to do, why those things starting happening right after Roger found out I didn't have a dad anywhere close by.  So one afternoon, I think two days before my school term resumed, Roger and I were sitting around, thinking back on all the good times we had and Roger's dad walked in.  I looked up at him and said, "I'm not sure I ever really thanked you for that fishing trip, so thanks."

He looked really confused, so I added, "Back when I was like seven or eight years old..."

He smiled in a sign of sudden memory and said,  "That was my pleasure, David.  And don't forget that we're your friends, too.  Not just Roger and Chelsea."

The "we're" apparently referred to Roger and Chelsea's parents.  That was the first time I'd ever had a true adult, someone at least a decade older than me, tell me to think of them as a friend in a way that I believed I could.

I made sure to thank Roger for his friendship, too, and he responded by saying something like, "Aww, man, it's not like you're never going to see me again."  This was especially true since he was going to college in state, only about an hour's drive from where we were sitting right then.  But on the other hand, I think he expected to come back "home" and visit a lot more often than he did.  It was actually nice that he absorbed himself into college, though, because a year later, I felt like it was acceptable for me to do the same, even though I didn't entirely want to.

But all of that was still a year away.  I had to get through senior year of high school first, and also wanted to focus on Daisy (my girlfriend) now that I had said my thanks to Roger and his dad.  When our school term started up again, I thought everything was back to normal between me and Daisy.  We didn't have any classes together this year, but we had the same lunch period and ate together nearly every day.  It seemed like it was a little bit less of a big deal that I was dating a girl two grades below me than it had been the year before.  I mean, such things were not unheard of, but our class sizes were big enough that people at our high school usually dated people within their own class, though I personally had not yet done so.  Anyway, it may have been because Daisy wasn't a Freshman anymore or because we had already made it through the six month mark together, but the whole progressive or gossip worthy or whatever you want to cal it aspect of our relationship seemed to have worn off completely.  I was fine with this.  I was looking forward to having a more normal, steady relationship.  At that point, I didn't think anything could really stand in our way.

It was nearly a month into the school year, six or seven weeks after Daisy had returned from her summer vacation, that she finally told me what had happened.  It turned out she had met a boy in Washington DC.  She hadn't meant to be attracted to him.  It just happened.  They had kissed.  Once.  That was it.  She was willing to put it behind her and go on dating me as if it never happened.  But it had happened and she was sorry.

I asked her if she still felt attracted to the boy.

She blushed and said, "Yes."

I asked her if she would prefer to stop dating me if she could be with him.  She again said, "yes."  But she quickly added, "He's in DC.  It would never work!"

I sighed and said, "I'm not sure it can work between us either."

Her eyes grew wide.  "Are you breaking up with me?" she asked.

I shook my head.  "No," I said, "but I think you should break up with me."  That might have been the most profoundly mature thing I had ever done.

Daisy started to cry and said that I was great, and if only she hadn't met this other guy and all of that, but eventually she admitted that we should break up.  When it was all done, I was surprised I wasn't more sad or angry.  She had cheated on me.  She had found someone she cared about more than me, someone she could connect with more.  I had spent the summer raising money for her, money I now would never spend on her.  But I realized that as nice as Daisy had been and as much as I had enjoyed being around her, I didn't "love" her.  In fact, I reflected, the only girls I might ever have "loved" were Emily and Chelsea.  And as for the money, well, I couldn't spend it on my girlfriend anymore, at least not right then, but I was sure I could find other useful things to do with it.

The break-up with Daisy turned out to be quite the blessing in disguise.  I had more time to focus on my school work and college preparations and settled on my first choice college.  I got help from both Steve and my English teacher in working on an essay and decided to retake the SAT (which I had taken over the summer) and see if I could get a higher score.  I improved my score by 150 points, which I found pretty satisfactory.

I determined to get the best grades I had even gotten, at which I also succeeded.  And as I worked and studied hard at my schooling, I would continue to find comfort in my cat Daisy.  She would curl up in my lap or on my feet as I wrote papers and did math problems and studied Chemistry.  Her presence always made me smile.  As my senior year went on and my first semester concluded rather successfully, I began to reflect on the fact that my first choice college, to which I had just submitted my early admissions application, was nearly 500 miles away.  That was 500 miles away from my mom and Steve and Chelsea and Daisy.  I knew I would miss them all, but as I thought about this all one evening, with Daisy beside me on the couch purring away as I gently stroked her, a prickle of fear set in upon me that it was possible Daisy would not live through my college years.

By this time, Daisy was 11 years old, and though cats can certainly live into their late teens and Daisy was also proclaimed healthy by the vet, it was very possible that she might go before I graduated from college and she turned 16.  My face grew sad as I stroked her lovingly.  My mother walked into the living room and noticed my long face and asked me what was wrong.

"I was just thinking about going away to college and leaving everyone and leaving Daisy behind, too," I said.

My mom sat down beside me and smiled gently.  She put her hand on my hand, the one that wasn't petting Daisy, and said, "Well, you can always take Daisy with you.  Maybe not the first year while you're living in the dorms, but after that, you could get an apartment or rent a house and Daisy could come live with you for the rest of college."

I looked up at my mom and smiled.  There was comfort but also pain in her eyes and I was struck with the sharp realization that my comment had made it sound like I cared about Daisy more than I cared about my own mother.  As much as I loved Daisy, I was quite sure that, even though I never said it, I loved my mother more.  I looked into her caring, loving eyes, and thought back on all the years she had put up with me, all the times she had said, "I love you" and I had been uncomfortable saying it back.  I looked at the woman who had raised me and cared for me, mostly on her own, for my entire life, and for the first time in my life, I said to her, "I love you, mom."

She nearly cried as she leaned forward and hugged me.  I took my hand off of Daisy to hug her back and though the cat was still purring and nudging me, in that moment, I was focused on my mother most of all.


Christmas was pretty intense that year.  It was the first time my extended family met Steve.  Aunts and uncles and cousins I didn't feel compelled to mention until now all got a chance to meet my mom's new suitor.  I know it was hard for my mom to introduce a new man to her family.  I think she might have felt she was betraying my dad a little, even though, or perhaps because, she had made an effort to assure me she wasn't.  She never had to worry about me feeling like she was betraying dad, and it turned out there wasn't much to worry about with the rest of our family either.  I even happened to notice her older sister, my aunt Mary, giving her a big hug in the kitchen and saying she was so happy to see my mom, Julie, happy again.

This family gathering came with a bit of a spotlight on me as well.  Everyone wanted to know what my plans for the future were, and particularly where I wanted to go to college and what I was planning to study.  Mom, Steve, and Grandma already knew my plans, but it was news to the rest of my family.  "You'll do great working with animals, no matter what specific path you choose to take with it!" my Aunt Mary said.  I should give Aunt Mary credit.  Though she wasn't a big part of my life, she was always very encouraging.  Some people can have a small impact but in a big way, or maybe it's a big impact in a small way.  Either way, it seems that's my Aunt Mary.

Exchanging gifts was pretty fun that year, too.  I had finally found something to do with the money I had earned that summer since I didn't have a girlfriend to spend it on.  I suppose I could have saved it for college, but it wasn't enough to make much of a difference.  It was enough, however, to buy some decent gifts for my mom and my grandma and even for Steve.  I bought a toy soccer ball for one of my cousins, too, and a picture book of animals for another.  My other cousins were older than me so I didn't get them anything, but they didn't get me anything either so I guess it was okay.  I got a framed photo of myself for my grandma (my mom told me she would like that), a spice rack for my mom (I had noticed the one she had at home had started to fall apart), and a sweater with a dog on it for Steve (which I figured could be a joke present depending on how he reacted to it, but he actually seemed to like it).  It felt good to be able to buy presents for others.  I don't even remember what I got that year, but I think there were some socks and books and I'm pretty sure I got a mini-fridge in preparation for college.  I can't remember for sure if the fridge was for my birthday or Christmas that year, but either way, it ended up being quite handy to have in my dorm room.  I was often pretty bad about going out to get food Freshman year, so I stocked it up with Lunchables and other stuff I was probably too old to be eating and avoiding starving to death.  But as I seem prone to do, that's getting ahead just a little.  I'll wrap up Christmas first by saying it was very nice to see all my family together and made me wish for a moment that I got to see them all more often, but by the time I got back home to a meowing Daisy, I was perfectly content to just lay around with her purring by my side.

The rest of winter break was a nice relaxing break, but by the time school started up again, I was starting to feel nervous.  I was expecting my letter back from my first pick college any day.  That was when I would find out if I needed to mail additional applications to other schools or if I could relax and enjoy my admittance into my top pick.  Now, if I had gone for the school on my list that was hardest to get into, I wouldn't have been so nervous because I would have assumed I wouldn't be accepted.  But my top choice was just enough of a stretch that I wasn't certain I would get it, but felt I had a really good chance.  Every day that I drove home from school to find that my letter hadn't come yet was another day of both relief that I hadn't been turned down and torture wondering if I would be accepted.

"Just relax," Chelsea told me one evening when we were watching a movie at her house and she noticed me fidgeting.  "Would it be the end of the world if you didn't get into this school?"

Part of me wondered if Chelsea sad that just because she didn't want me to go to this particular school.  She had already expressed her opinion that the school seemed too serious and even though she respected my desire to learn to help animals, she couldn't imagine she was end up at the same college.  She didn't say she wanted to go to the same college as me, but I think it was fair to assume that was her implication.

Chelsea and I had started to get close again since my break-up with Daisy and her break-up with her latest boyfriend.  I remember asking Chelsea that semester how many boys she had dated and she laughed, a poor attempt at covering the fact she had to stop and count, and then said, "seven or eight."  I had only dated three girls, I told her.  She nodded and said, "I know."

Even though Chelsea and I were both free agents now, I hadn't even considered asking her out.  I figured that dating her and then going away to college a few months later would be much more cruel than never giving it a shot at all, so we remained friends, hung out a lot, talked and shared with one another as if we were dating, but never kissed or even held hands.  I think we both thought to ourselves it was better that way, but our "relationship" or whatever was the one thing we didn't talk about.

And then the letter came.  My mom was at work, so I couldn't open it with her.  I decided to take it over to Chelsea's house and open it with her instead.  My heart was pounding.  The envelope seemed too thick for a simple rejection letter to me, but I didn't want to get my hopes up.  Besides, as soon as Chelsea let me in and looked at the envelope, she got my hopes up for me by frowning and saying, "You got in."

The look on her face made me regret the joy I was hoping to experience and wonder if it was a mistake to share this moment with her.  "I don't know that yet," I said.

She smiled, looked down at the envelope and back at me and said again, even more confidently, "You got in."

Chelsea was right.  I got in.  When I opened it and smiled nervously at Chelsea, she smiled encouragingly at me.  "I'm happy for you," she said, trying to sound convincing.  And then she opened her arms for a hug.  It might have been the most awkward hug I've ever had with someone I really care about.  When I pulled away from her, I just didn't feel right.

"Chelsea, I'm sorry," I said.

She frowned.  "Don't be sorry," she said.  "You should be happy.  I should be sorry for not showing more happiness for you.  I am sorry.  I am so sorry."  Tears were starting to form in her eyes.

"Chelsea..." was all I could say.

She smiled despite the tears.  "It's okay," she said.  "You're going to have a great time at college.  You probably won't even miss me at all."

"That's not true," I immediately protested.

"Well if it does turn out to be true," she said, "just remember that it's okay.  Really, David, everything, and I mean everything, is okay."

Somehow, that made me feel better, a lot better, and I gave her another hug, this one much more genuine and heartfelt and less awkward.  "Your mom will probably be home soon," she said when we pulled apart.  "You should go tell her the good news."

"Thanks, Chelsea," I replied, smiling but still feeling a twinge of pain.  "I... I don't know what else to say."

She giggled.  I felt like I hadn't heard her giggle like that in years.  It was like we were little kids again.  "Then don't say anything silly," she suggested, giving me a playful punch.  "Go on now.  I'll see you at school tomorrow."

So I did as I was told.  I went home, grinning ear to ear now that I felt like I had Chelsea's seal of approval, and had a grand impromptu celebration with my mom that night.  She decided to bake two dozen chocolate chip cookies which we ate over the course of the next week.  I didn't think anymore about Chelsea at the time, but now I sometimes wonder what she was doing that night and whether she was sharing my news with her family or sitting alone in her room wondering about what could have been.  If she was wondering what could have been, I don't think her wondering lasted long.  Chelsea was a strong, independent girl.  She didn't need me.  She didn't need anyone.  But what we need and what we want are often two very different things.


The rest of my senior year was all about balance:  balance between spending too much time studying and still spending enough to not completely negate my college acceptance, balance between being excited about college and sad about leaving my friends and family, balance between looking forward to higher education and looking forward to the college experience that I heard so much about from Roger.

As for my current school work, I found I didn't have to work very hard at all.  All I needed was to maintain a B average, and I was pretty well above that already with my 3.5 GPA so I figured that even if I got Cs in all my classes, I would probably be alright.  Still, I wasn't a total slacker, so I gave a good effort in my classes and got nothing below a B-.  The B- was in English literature, which was something I wasn't super interested in, so I was more than okay with my grade.  I got As in my math and science courses, which were sure to be the most important for my planned career.  My science grades had been pretty steady as As and my math grades had improved over my high school career, so I was pretty happy.

For the excitement over college, it came through quite a bit when I was at home, mostly because my mom encouraged it.  At school, I was about as excited as those around me seemed to be.  I did learn that there was at least one other kid in my class going to my school, a boy named Trevor to whom I had never spoken before.  He was fairly nerdy and I'm pretty sure he was valedictorian for our class so the fact that he wanted to go to the same school I was going to both inspired me as to its academic quality and scared me a little as I realized it was possible the school might be too hard for me.  But Trevor was going into something called biomedical engineering and the school we were going to was much more intense in its engineering programs than in other programs, so I figured it would still be okay.  At any rate, it was nice to have someone I at least sort of knew going to the same school as me.  Trevor was even more shy and quiet than me, but I managed to have a few lunches with him and learned a little bit about his interests, which were almost entirely academic.

As for the balance between academics and social aspects of college that I had to look forward to, talking to Trevor kept me covered on the academic side and talking to Roger kept me covered on the social side.  Roger and I would get on instant messenger about once a week and I would hear about the cool new club that he found out about or the intramural sports team he joined or the cute girl he met in the school cafeteria.  Though my school of choice didn't seem to have quite as many extracurriculars as Rogers, it had most of the things he mentioned, and it had all of the things I was most interested in, which was why I had chosen it as my first pick school.  I had a fairly high level of confidence that I could manage my academics while still having fun in college, but that didn't eliminate my nervousness about trying to do so or about leaving my friends (mostly Chelsea) and family (my mom) and precious kitty behind.


After spending that entire semester thinking about college, going back and forth between excitement and sadness, I decided that on my graduation day, I was not going to think about the future, even though I'm almost certain that's exactly what Trevor recommended we do in his commencement speech, but instead I was going to think back on the past four years of high school.  I had had two girlfriends, which I decided had turned out to be plenty.  I had become a great goalie for our soccer team and helped the team earn a third place finish in the state my senior year.  It was down one step from the year before, but considering how many great seniors we had lost, including Roger, I figured it was pretty good.  I had kept up a good GPA, actually boosting it just slightly to a 3.6.  I had established a good friendship with Chelsea and felt good about our relationship, lacking romance though it was.  And I had given cat Daisy the love and affection she deserved.  And perhaps most importantly, I had finally told my mother that I had loved her.  Okay, I guess I focused a lot on my senior year, but that was what was freshest in my mind.

After the graduation ceremony, I had a reception at my house.  Lots of my graduating friends knew what a great cook my mom was and I had mentioned that she was making appetizers, so half of them (which was about 3 or 4 including Emily) sneaked away from their own parties to come make an appearance at mine.  I was pretty proud of that.

I also had visitors from younger grades.  I had invited Daisy as a sign of good will, and she came up looking pretty but a bit nervous.  I couldn't help but ask how things were with the DC boy.  She blushed and said they were pretty good for it being a long distance relationship and that she was going to visit him during the first part of the summer and he was coming to visit her during the second part.  I told her I was happy for her, and I had pretty much convinced myself that I really meant it.  If we had never dated, I certainly would have been happy for her, but even when you know its best not to go on, it's still kind-of hard to really be happy to see the other person with someone else.

One person you might be surprised was at the party was, oh I'm pretty sure his name was Sean.  I didn't mention him by name before, but he was the energetic kindergartener I had been paired up with when I was in sixth grade.  I don't remember explicitly inviting him, but I think my mom did.  At any rate, it was actually really nice to see him.  He was all smiles as he handed me a book on writing college papers that he had purchased for me.  I was at first at a lose for words, and then he thanked me for all I had done for him and all I could think to say was, "Just make sure you do the same for someone else."

He nodded and with a smile said, "I already have."  He told me briefly me about the kindergartener her had been matched up this past year, his sixth grade year, and how she had been rather loud and loved to squeal a lot.  He told me he had been supportive and patient just like I had and that he felt like she had calmed down a little without losing her spark, just like he hoped he had.

"You absolutely did!" I told him, and I gave him a hug.  I haven't talked to him again since then, but it was really nice to see him like that, especially since I had made my decision to spend the day reflecting on the past instead of looking on the future.

Someone who I knew would always be a part of my past and my future was Chelsea, and of course she was there at my graduation.  Even though she was friends with a couple of other seniors, she spent the entire time with me at my party.  I think afterwards there was some gossip that Chelsea had a thing for me, again or still as the case may have been, but we never talked about it and I know she didn't let it bother her.  She didn't get me a gift because, as she said, there would be plenty more years ahead to exchange presents.  Like Sean, though, she did give me a hug and told me again how much she was going to miss me.

"I'm not thinking about that today," I said.  I grabbed a toothpick and poked a meatball off of a nearby tray my mom had set out.  "Here," I added, "have a meatball."

She laughed as she took the tooth pick from me.  "You see," she said.  "What am I going to do without you?"

I shrugged.  "If you're worried about the food," I replied, "you don't need to because my mom will still be around."

She giggled (again with the giggling I hadn't heard from her in years) and popped the whole, relatively large and normally worth of two bites, meatball in her mouth.

Chelsea might have thought she was going to miss me more than she had missed any of her older siblings or former boyfriends who had already or were going to go away to college, but it turns out I was completely right about her.  She did just fine without me.

I think having the last summer together helped both of us.  We started out spending lots of time together, even more than we had been since there wasn't school to get in the way, but we gradually cut back so that I could spend more time with my mom and she could go to a summer camp she had wanted to attend and I said I'd feel terrible to keep her from.  It worked out nicely that we seemed to get in plenty of time together and yet also adjusted to time apart by the time it was time for me to leave.

My mom was going with me to get settled in the dorms.  Chelsea didn't ask to go along and I didn't ask her to come.  I figured it was better that way.  I did ask her to come over to visit my mom and play with Daisy from time to time, though.  She promised I would.  I told her it was nice that she was still here to take care of Daisy during my year of required dorm living during which I couldn't have a pet.  Chelsea gave what I would call a sad smile and said she was glad she could help.  I couldn't help but think of when I had told human Daisy, at my graduation party, that I was happy for her and her DC boyfriend.  But I put that quickly out of my mind, gave Chelsea and cat Daisy both hugs appropriately sized for each of them, and then waved as my mom and I drove off.  I still remember Chelsea standing on our front lawn, holding Daisy (whom we had taken out on her leash to say good-bye), and waving that patient, tolerant, and aging cat's paw after me.  It was hard for me not to cry, but once they were out of sight, I looked ahead and smiled as I thought of all the fun and learning college was sure to offer me.


When we got to the college, it was a mess.  If you've ever been to a campus on Freshman move-in day, you know exactly what I'm talking about.  Cars were backed up for blocks.  Parents and students were swarming everywhere.  Upperclassmen were doing their best to direct the chaos.  It seemed like a mad house.  My mom chuckled nervously.  "I'm sure it will be fine, mom," I said.  I was actually a little grateful that there couldn't be a mad rush for my mom to get me set up and leave quickly.  She wasn't planning on doing that anyway, but at least now she couldn't and I couldn't be blamed for spending a little extra time with her before she left me never to be seen again until Thanksgiving.

The line of cars slowly moved along and after what seemed like an hour, we were able to unload.  A couple of upperclassmen helped us, and then a guy wearing sunglasses and a backwards hat came running up, too.  "Yo, I'm Chris," he said.  "You're in Rockport dorm?"

I nodded and glanced down at my room assignment.  "Yeah, room 203 with a guy named Chris."  I looked up at him suspiciously.

He laughed and threw up his hands.  "Guilty as charged!" he said.  He leaned in and whispered, "Hey, my older sister goes here so I'm not a total noob.  I'll help you out however you need."  I imagined he winked at me or something, but all I could see was the goofy smile on his face.

"Thanks," I replied nervously.  "I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

So Chris joined in with the moving crew and we ended up getting my stuff into the dorm in no time.  "Well, I should probably be going," my mother said.

I glanced behind me and saw Chris sitting on his bed tossing a football in the air, but I didn't care about what he thought of me, so I said, "You don't have to go yet."

My mom smiled and ran her hand over my hair.  "I'll see you again before you know it," she said.  Then she gave me a big hug and she was gone.

Chris tossed the football aside and leaned back on the bed as I closed the door.  "She seemed nice," he said.

I smirked a little as I told him, "Yeah, she's the best."

Chris sighed.  "I wish my mom had helped me move in," he said.  "Since my older sister goes here, she just let the two of us handle this."

I was shocked.  "Really?"

He sighed again.  "Yeah, really."

I eyed Chris carefully.  I knew Roger's father and mother had both gone with him to get settled in at college, even though he was their third child to go to college and the second to go to the particular school he was at.  I couldn't imagine parents not taking an interest in taking their kids to their first year of college.

"That sucks, man," I said.

He sat up and looked at me.  His sadness seemed genuine.  "Yeah, it does," he said.  I got the feeling he wanted to say more but had enough social decorum to not bring it up with someone he just met.  I figured that was fine, and probably good even, since we would have the whole year together as roommates.

Wanting to not end the conversation awkwardly, I glanced at the football and asked, "Do you play?"

He laughed and responded, "Not well.  Are you into sports?"

"I played a lot of soccer in high school," I said.

"You on the team here?"

I shrugged.  "I didn't get a scholarship for that or anything," I told him.  "I'm not sure I want to play on the team.  I'd do intramurals or something."

"Yeah, me, too," Chris agreed.  He picked up the football and said, "You want to go out to the quad and throw this around or something?"

I smiled, thinking of how my friendship with Roger and said, "Yeah sure, but I've never played football before."

"Ah, you'll be fine," Chris assured me with a wave of his hand.  "Whatever you don't know, I can teach you."

There was certainly a lot of teaching on Chris's part.  Whenever I threw the ball, the spiral was terrible.  He tried to make me feel better by saying he could only throw because he had been QB.  It did turn out I was a lot better at catching the ball than throwing it.  I enjoyed catching more than throwing, too.  A couple of other guys noticed I throwing the "pig skin" around and asked if they could join.  When a couple more showed up, we started playing a three on three touch instead of tackle game.  I was a little concerned about this since that day was only about the fourth time in my life I had even touched a football, but Chris told me again that I would be fine so I gave it a shot.  Turns out Chris was right.  Though it wasn't a very serious game, the team consisting of myself, Chris, and some other freshman named Steven came out ahead.  As I shared high fives and a smile with my teammates, I decided Chris wasn't so bad after all.

It turned out Chris's sister wasn't so bad either.  I met her right before classes started.  She came over to make sure her kid brother was ready for school to begin.  When she walked into our dorm room, it was all that goofy jaw dropping heart melting nonsense you see on those lame romantic comedies, except it didn't seem lame at the moment because she was gorgeous.  She must have noticed me staring because she looked over at me with her calm blue eyes and long flowing red hair and asked so sweetly, "Are you okay?"

Chris laughed and patted his sister on the back as he gently escorted her out of the room.  "Yeah, sis, he's fine.  You should know by now the effect you have on people."

Chris closed the door behind her and looked over at me as I began to recover.  "Yeah she's beautiful and nice," he said.  "Beauty pageant winner even.  She's smart enough, too.  But don't get your hopes up.  Every guy not related to her thinks what you're thinking right now and it usually doesn't end well."

Chris wouldn't say more about it than that, but I had come to trust him enough over the past week to heed his warning and resolved to do my best not to get involved with his sister.  Since I had never asked an older girl out before (you may recall the older girl I dated in high school asked me out), I figured my nerves would prevent me from getting into too much trouble anyway.  But then, as fate would have it, it turned out Chris's sister was a TA for my Freshman English class.

I remember Chris laughing when I told him.  "That's great!" he said.

"Yeah, great," I grumbled.

"Don't you see," Chris said, fighting for his laughter to die down, "now you really can't date her, dude.  TAs aren't allowed to date students in their classes."  He quieted down and walked over to pat me on the back.  "Trust me," he continued.  "She's my sister and I love her, but she's crap in relationships.  She always ends up either upsetting or getting upset by the other person.  I like you and would like to remain your friend so please, don't date my sister."

Begrudgingly, I thanked Chris for his advice and knowledge of campus policy and proceeded to spend the rest of the semester doing my best to focus on my papers and not picture Victoria's (that was her name) gorgeous, flowing strands of red hair.  Somehow, I managed to power through and got two Bs and an A- on my first two papers.

I was doing well in my other classes too, plus having fun hanging out with Chris and some other guys we met on our floor.  We did join the intramural sports scene.  Our flag football team was called "We Live to Lose" but we had a winning season.  I also sat in on some student council meetings and ended up joining an academic accountability committee that made sure professors were held accountable to their students and academic policies and procedures were transparent to everyone.  It was kind of nerdy, but it was important.  I hadn't personally encountered any of the problems the committee was trying to prevent, but I figured that could be due in part to the fact that they did a good job addressing them.  Trevor, from my high school, was on the committee, too, so that was a nice way to keep a connection to home since Trevor wasn't into sports.

Trevor also wasn't into my other new college interest, which was music.  Specifically, I decided to take piano lessons.  I was absolutely terrible and came to appreciate the importance of learning young, but I figured college was the time to try new things, and being able to play an instrument was something I had always wanted to be able to do.  I chose piano because practice rooms were readily available, fully equipped with the pianos so that I didn't have to buy an instrument.

The final "extracurricular" I got involved in Freshman year wasn't official.  The guys in my dorm room and I took to playing video games.  My mom never had gotten me a system, which shocked and amazed all the other guys, so they got me into Halo and Super Smash Bros and Mario Kart.  It was a blast.  I had always enjoyed playing with my Game Boy.  Playing on a console with my friends was even better.

When Thanksgiving rolled around, I was fairly ashamed to discover that my mom was right:  it seemed like no time at all had passed since she had dropped me off at the beginning of the school year and said, "I'll see you again before you know it."

When I went home for Thanksgiving, I didn't tell my mom this, though.  I just told her how great it was to see her, which it was, and how delicious the meal was, which it always was, and I treasured the time with my mom and Steve and with Daisy.  Daisy was doing quite well and my mom told me that Chelsea came by regularly to check on her, but Chelsea was no where to be seen over Thanksgiving break.  Roger was home and stopped by my house on Saturday before we both headed back to school.  He told me Chelsea wasn't feeling well but I always wondered if she just didn't want to see me.

I did my best to put all that out of my mind as I headed back to college to wrap up my first semester and bring home the 3.67 GPA that made me feel I was off to an excellent start.


After that success of a semester, I already got to go back home again.  This was when I was reminded of just how selfish and close-minded I could sometimes be.  I spent so much time thinking about Daisy and hoping she would get sick or something while I was gone that I completely forgot about the fact that dogs have much shorter lifespans than cats.  Now, in my defense, Chelsea's dog Lily wasn't that old.  She wasn't quite 9 years when I came home for Christmas break.  But she was starting to show signs of old age.  Apparently, it was becoming harder for her to walk and she started making a wheezing noise just days before I returned, too.

I remember going over to Chelsea's house, all excited to surprise her and tell her I was back, and I found her sitting on the front steps out in the cold without a jacket wiping tears from her eyes.  "Chelsea, what's wrong?" I asked, sitting down beside her.

"Lily's sick," she said.  "I'm not sure she's going to get better."

I frowned, but I tried to be comforting even though my voice was trembling a bit as I said, "I'm sure she'll be okay."

Chelsea shook her head.  "No," she said.  "I think yet another one of my friends is going to leave me."

I was caught off guard to hear her apparently shift the conversation into blaming me.  "I'm sorry, Chelsea.  I had to go away to college," I told her.

She looked up at me, a flash of anger showing in her eyes.  "Number one, you don't even know I was talking about you.  Number two, you could have gone to school here in town!"

I sighed, feeling annoyed and then feeling guilty for being annoyed at my grieving friend.  "That's not fair," I whispered.

I had my hands on my knees and was looking down, unsure of what else to say, when I was startled again to feel the touch of Chelsea's hand on mine.  I looked up at her and she was forcing a smile.  "I know," she said tenderly.  "I'm sorry."  Then she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek, surprising me again.  "I'm sorry," she said again, blushing slightly and standing up.  "Would you like to come inside?  It's freezing out here.  I think my mom is going to make some hot chocolate or something."

I smiled as I pushed myself up to my feet.  "Yeah, that would be great," I said.  I'm glad I didn't try any more to convince Chelsea that Lily was going to be fine because her beloved pet passed away two days after Christmas.  It was sad for sure, but I have to admit that I was so thankful that it wasn't Daisy's time to go yet and I gave her so much extra love and affection the night after I found out about Lily that my cat probably thought it was Christmas part two.

Just like the first semester of school passed in a flash, that Christmas break passed in a flash, too.  It felt like I didn't have enough time before it was back to school.  It was strange that I felt sad leaving home, but had also felt a little sad leaving school just a few weeks before.  I was definitely happy to get back in the dorms and hang out with Chris again, but I couldn't help but wish that Chelsea were there with us, too.  I was starting to think Chelsea might like Chris and that I could likely get them to date.  I wasn't afraid of losing any of them as friends if that went south.

But for that to even have a shot at working, Chelsea would have to go to college at our school, and no matter how much I tried to convince myself that maybe she would, I was quite sure that she wouldn't, especially since we had talked briefly about her plans and she was most likely going to go to the college in town that she had expressed the opinion that I should have gone to.  She had other schools she was considering as well, all of which I was sure she would get into, but my place of higher learning was not on her list, much to my dismay and lack of surprise.

Anyway, I managed through another semester, and by managed I mean I had a great time.  Chris was as awesome as ever, and never once did he try to get me any illegal substances as I had feared he might when I first met him.  We did go to a party one time where alcohol was being served and I had my first taste of beer (okay yeah, I was a good kid in high school), but it was pretty disgusting and I made a face the cracked Chris up.  "Maybe you should try some of the girly drinks," he suggested.  I followed him into the kitchen and he made me one and it was delicious, but I decided I didn't want to get drunk the first time I ever had anything to drink so Chris shrugged and downed it himself, even though he had told me it was better as a "sipping drink".  Whatever.  That was Chris.  He was a fun guy.  He continued to remind me of Roger and make me grateful to be his roommate.

As that semester drew to a close, the topic of housing for next year came up and I told Chris that I wanted to get an apartment off campus so that I could have my cat live with me.

"That's cool, man," he said.  "Daisy, right?"

I nodded, a little embarrassed that I talked about my cat enough that he would remember her name.

"That's pretty sweet," he said.  "You know, I like cats, even though we never had one."

I smiled as I picked up on his not too subtle hint.  This was where I had wanted to steer the conversation anyway.  "Would you like to share an apartment?" I asked.

He jumped up off his bed and punched me, not to hard, in the arm, "Yeah, man," he said.  "How did you know?"  And then he laughed and said maybe we could get some of the other guys on our floor to rent an apartment near ours, or maybe we could rent a house or something.  I thought that would be great, so we started asking around and looking for apartments with vacancies and ended up teaming up with two other guys to rent two two-bedroom apartments in the same building.  "If this goes well," Chris said, "maybe we can do the house thing Junior year.  It will probably even be cheaper than renting two apartments."

"Just as long as whoever rents the house to us doesn't mind a cat getting hair everywhere," I said.

Chris laughed.  "If this apartment doesn't mind it, I'm pretty sure we can find a rental house that doesn't mind it either."

I left school that semester with a marginally lower GPA (3.63), but with a bright hope for the future.  I was pretty sure Daisy would help keep me more focused on my work and studying, since I wouldn't waste any time wishing she was there with me.  I reflected briefly that I probably loved my cat a bit more than most people who aren't crazy would, but people knew this about me and they still liked me, so I figured if it was okay by people I liked and respected, then it was okay.


That summer was pretty fun because I decided that I would get a job at my mom's restaurant after all.  She was thrilled and put in a great word for me so that I could be promoted straight to waiter if I wanted.  Being a full on waiter sounded way too hard to me, though, so I opted to just refill waters and clear tables at needed and occasionally fill the role of dishwasher.  My mom actually liked it when I was dishwasher because she could poke her head over and say hello in those rare moments when she wasn't crazy busy in the kitchen.  As embarrassing as that could be, I never regretted for a moment that I had chosen to work at the same place where my mother worked.  Plus, now I could take the employee discount on meals and feel like I had really earned it instead of just standing on the shoulders of my mom.

That employee discount was destined to come in handy, because I also met a new girl that summer.

My college decided it was a good idea to let me know, with their permission, the names of all the incoming Freshman from my city.  I kind of wished they had done this the year before, but the point was to get us all together for a social mixer thing before the school year started so that new students could meet each other and some returning college kids before the year got started.  The girl I met was named Hannah, and she was determined to be a vet.  She didn't have cats, but she had a dog and a ferret and her grandparents owned horses.  She was fascinating and awesome and I really wanted to ask her out on a date right there at the social, but I didn't want to be too forward and still managed someone to get her phone number from her.  When I called her a few days later and asked if she'd like to go out for dinner sometime, I was on cloud nine when she said yes, and I decided that with this girl, it was best to go big or go home and so I took her to my mom's restaurant for that very first date and she loved it.  I then told her I worked here and we could come back anytime and she said, "How about next week?"  It wasn't like me get all emotional over a girl so quickly, but I really felt like I was finally, really in love.  And best of all, we wouldn't have to say good-bye when the summer ended!  Our relationship was just getting started!


You shouldn't be at all surprised to learn that Hannah loved Daisy.  Everyone who liked animals adored my precious Daisy.  We didn't run around playing with Daisy with quite the gusto that Chelsea and I used to when we were young.  Both we and Daisy were too old for that.  But we spent several evenings before summer was over sitting on the couch at my mom's house, watching TV and petting Daisy together.  Sometimes our hands would touch and Hannah would stop and blush and I'd lean over and kiss her.  It was like something out of a movie, still.

My mom really liked Hannah, too.  Hannah learned that my mom was the cook at "our" restaurant and thought that was great.  She was enthusiastic about my mom's cooking (and didn't mind that I let my mom do the cooking since she was much better at it than me).  Hannah did convince me to make dinner for her once that summer, with some help from my mom.  It turned out okay, and Hannah said, "Now that you have some practice, it will be easier when we cook together during the school year."  I couldn't help but smile at the thought that she, like me, was looking forward to our school year together.

Steve and Hannah got along well, too.  They talked about dogs and horses.  I learned that Steve had only ridden a horse once from talking to Hannah and she told him that he and my mom and me would have to come to her grandparents farm sometime.  It was mostly her aunt and uncle who maintained it now, but they still had a couple of horses, and some ducks and chickens, too.

The one person Hannah didn't hit it off with was Chelsea, and that's because they didn't really meet.  I had told Hannah that Chelsea was a childhood friend who lived down the street, but I kind-of left it at that.  They saw each other on the street on time and I introduced Hannah to Chelsea as my girlfriend and Chelsea had a look of surprise at first, but then quickly recovered with a smile and said, "Pleased to meet you."  They talked very briefly about college plans for next year (Chelsea had chosen to stay in town like I expected due to her having said that was her most likely plan) and then we parted ways.

"She seems nice," Hannah said.

"She's a good friend," I said.  And that was the end of that.  Love of animals didn't even come up at all.  They didn't really meet.

Hannah and Chelsea could have been great friends, I was sure, but I was selfish about it.  I didn't want to be around the girl I was wild for and the girl about whom I had had confused feelings for the last few years.  Being with Hannah made me pretty sure that whatever I felt for Chelsea wasn't romantic love, since there wasn't the same force of attraction that I felt with Hannah, but I still didn't want to risk it by bringing the two together.

The unfortunate part of all of this was that I didn't spend as much time with Chelsea that summer as I had originally planned.  We sat together on her front step near the end of the summer, just a week before I had to leave for school, and I apologized.  She shrugged.  "It's okay," she said, not too convincingly.  "Maybe it's time I moved on anyway."

"Chelsea..." as usual when she said something like that, all I could manage to say was her name.

She looked up at me.  "I'm sorry," she said.  "I shouldn't do this to you."  Then she smiled.  It certainly seemed like a real smile to me.  "I'm glad you're happy with..."

"Hannah," I supplied.

She nodded.  "Yes, I'm glad you're happy with Hannah.  I just want you to know that you always know where to find me."

I smiled.  "At least for the next four years," I said, thinking about her college years.

She shook her head.  "No," she said.  "I'm going to make sure that you always know where to find me."

I didn't know what to say in response to that, so I just took another sip of my lemonade and she did the same as we watched the sun set together and had absolutely nothing romantic happen.


I'd now like to flash back just a few days to the evening I met Hannah's parents.  There isn't much to tell, but I should probably at least mention it.  Hannah and I had been together for two months now and were starting to plan for the upcoming school year.  I had told Hannah I was living in an apartment with my freshman roommate and with Daisy.  She said that was awesome and wished she could have a pet Freshman year.

"I think you can have a gold fish," I ventured.

She smiled.  "Maybe I will," she replied happily.  "Or a beta fish or something.  I can't imagine not having any pet for an entire year."

"Yeah, it was tough," I admitted, "but making friends helps out."

"And I've already got you," she said, leaning her head on my shoulder.  It came out a little cheesy, but it was still sweet.

We just sat there enjoying each other's company for a bit and then I brought up the fact that I would be driving myself to college this year.  "Would you like to ride with me?" I asked.

Hannah's eyes lit up in that beautiful way.  "I'd love to," she said, "but I suspect my parents will want to drop me off.  You could meet them and if they like you, we could ask about carpooling and letting them say their goodbyes here."

"I don't want to mess things up with your parents," I said.  I felt bad that I hadn't thought about Hannah's parents wanting to take her to Freshman year just like my mom had.

She shrugged.  "I'm sure it will be fine," she said.  "Let's just see what they say."

So we arranged to have dinner with Hannah's parents at "our" restaurant that Friday.  Hannah's parents were very sweet, down to earth people.  Her father was a vet and her mother was an accountant.  They were fairly quiet, but her dad had a good strong laugh.  We all seemed to get along well and when Hannah mentioned how much more cost efficient it would be to carpool with me to college, her father just let that laugh go and said, "Sweetie, if you want to go on a road trip with your new boyfriend, you can just say so."

Hannah blushed and her mother touched Hannah's hand as she said, "It's fine, dear.  We'll just help you with the packing and loading and make sure to say lots of big goodbyes before you go."

Hannah's parents were really sweet people.  I liked them a lot and I was sure my mom would like them to, but when we told my mom about the plan to meet Hannah's parents, she said it was probably best if she just stay out of sight this first time.  "There will be plenty of time for me to meet them later, after you've already gotten to know them better," she said.  I was glad my mom imagined Hannah and I being together for a while.  I imagined it too.

So that was the dinner, and in the week ahead, I said my goodbyes to my mom and Steve and Chelsea and then Hannah's family helped her load her things into my car and we drove off together, me, Hannah, and Daisy, feeling like we were starting a new life together.  Hannah even opted to spend most of the trip in the back seat beside Daisy's carrier to keep my cat company.  I loved her even more for that.  I've heard that road trips can sometimes ruin a relationship, but this one wasn't long enough to cause too much trouble.  In fact, I felt like it was perfect.  The bumps in the road weren't coming until a fair bit later.


Hannah and I got to campus right on schedule.  We decided to go to my apartment first since the line for the dorms was just as long as it had been when I was a Freshman the year before.  Plus, we wanted to get Daisy out of her carrier and start getting her acquainted with her new surroundings as soon as possible.  We had brought all of her favorite toys from home and the blanket I always used on my bed when she slept on top of me every night she could.

We had arranged to have furniture delivered to the apartment the next day, so for now there were just a couple of folding chairs and a television we had brought along.  We took Daisy in and opened the carrier and sat on my blanket on the floor as we watched her timidly sniff around.  She came over to me, looked up at me with her big green eyes and let out a plaintive little "meow".  Hannah chuckled and reached out her hand to pet the cat we both loved.  Then she leaned her head on my shoulder and said, "I think she's going to like it here."

I looked over at Hannah and smiled.  "I sure hope so," I said.

I didn't really want to leave Daisy alone, but I knew we had to get Hannah moved into her dorm room.  When I said we had better get going, Hannah said, "If you're okay with me driving my car, I can go over and get checked in and then come back later."

I smiled as I looked at her and continued to pet Daisy.  "Yeah, that would be great," I said.  I kissed Hannah good bye and looked back at Daisy, reflecting on the idea that my life couldn't get more perfect.

Hannah came back later that night and we fell asleep on the blanket on top of the hardwood floor with Daisy as our pillow.  I don't remember what I dreamed about if I dreamed about anything.  It seemed like my dream was my reality.

Over the next few days, Hannah got oriented to the college, I got my furniture, and Chris showed up.  I was so happy to see him.  We had emailed and texted a little bit over the summer to make sure we were good to go with our apartment.  I had mentioned Hannah to him, so the first thing he asked after saying hello to me was, "Where's your girl?"

I laughed.  "She's out right now," I told him.

Chris pointed behind me.  "Isn't that her right there?" he asked.

I turned and looked at Daisy who was plodding over to see who this new person was.  I rolled my eyes as I looked back to Chris.  "Very funny," I acknowledged rather sarcastically.  "For your information, Hannah loves that I love Daisy."

Chris smiled and bent down to try to beckon Daisy forward.  "Well you sound perfect for each other," he said.  Once Daisy saw Chris was friendly, she was happy to let him pet her and even purred when he did so.  "This is a nice cat," he said.

"Yes she certainly is," I agreed.


Once classes started, I found just how hard working Hannah was as a student.  The answer was:  pretty darn hard working.  She had been laid back over the summer, but when it came to her studies, she really got down to business.  I encouraged her to take a break from studying to try new things, but it was difficult because she was determined to do the best she possibly could.

"What have you always wanted to learn to do or learn to do better?" I asked her.

"Be a fantastic vet," she said.

"Besides that," I prompted.

She sighed.  "Well, I'd like to be able to take good pictures, be able to display some nice photos of animals that I took in my vets office, that would be pretty cool."

I smiled.  "Then take a photography course next semester!"

She looked at me and slowly she smiled back and nodded.  "Okay," she said.  "Maybe I will."

I did also manage to get Hannah to come to some of my intramural sports matches.  Football was the first sport of the year, and she enjoyed watching me run around trying to dodge away from the other players grabbing at my flags.  "That looks like fun," she said after the first game.

"You know they have a women's team," I said.

Her eyes got bigger.  "Really?  A women's football team?"

"Well, flag football intramural," I clarified.

"Is it too late for me to sign up?" she asked.

I laughed.  "I'm sure it isn't," I said.  After a beat I added, "This is what I've been trying to tell you.  College isn't just about studying hard all the time.  You should have fun and try new things, too."

"Yeah, yeah," she mumbled, and punched me playfully in the arm.

I loved being with Hannah.  I loved the feeling that we could help each other and teach each other new things and that it was just fun to be around each other.  I decided there was no girl I would rather share my life with, even Chelsea.  It was a tough realization, but I really felt that if I had to choose between my friendship with Chelsea and my relationship with Hannah, I would choose Hannah.  I anticipated my relationship with Chelsea potentially being a problem with my relationship with Hannah, so I thought long and hard about it to decide Hannah was more important to me.  What I didn't anticipate was what would actually be the first problem with my relationship with Hannah.

It wasn't the first or even the second time it happened that it was a problem.  It wasn't until the third time, just before Thanksgiving, that Hannah brought it up.  The "it" in question was the way I apparently still looked at Chris's sister, Victoria.

Victoria, now a senior and acting as a dedicated big sister, came over to visit her "baby brother" about once a week.  Sometimes Chris was happy to see her, sometimes he was annoyed or embarrassed.  Based on my experiences with Chelsea and Roger, it was a perfectly normal sibling relationship.  What apparently wasn't normal, according to Hannah, was the way I apparently looked at Victoria whenever she was around.

Now, Hannah wasn't always around at the same time Victoria was.  This was why it wasn't until right before Thanksgiving that this "issue" finally came up.  It was a Saturday.  Victoria had stopped by on her way to meet a study group or a boyfriend or something.  I don't remember exactly.  Anyway, she came to say hi and make sure Chris was studying and eating his vegetables, at which he rightful rolled his eyes.  As far as I was aware, I glanced up from where I was working at the dinner table with Hannah and smiled a few times.  Victoria might have winked at me or something like that, but I honestly don't remember it being any more than that.

Victoria left and about 10 minutes later, seeming to me out of no where, Hannah slammed her book down on the table, stared at me and asked, "Would you rather be with her?"

I wasn't even thinking about the fact that Victoria had just been there so I asked, "Who?"

Hannah rolled her eyes.  "You know who," she stated.

I thought for a moment and then asked, "Victoria?"

"Yes Victoria!" Hannah exclaimed.  "Every time she comes over you have goo-goo eyes for her."

"First of all, I don't even know what goo-goo eyes are," I said, feeling a bit annoyed and threatened by Hannah's accusations, "and second of all, you aren't even here every time she comes over so how would you know what I do every time."

"Oh, so it's different when I'm not here?" Hannah asked, raising her voice.  "Is it worse or better?"

"I don't know!" I exclaimed, nearly shouting now.  "I don't know because I don't even know what I did!"

It was at this point that Chris emerged from his bedroom.  "Everything okay out here?"

"I don't know!" I shouted.

Hannah sighed and rolled her eyes.  "No, it's not," she said.  "But don't worry.  I'm leaving.  Tell your sister thanks a lot."

"Hannah..." I reached out towards her, trying to get her to stay.

"Save it," she retorted, and slammed the door behind her as she left.

"What did you do?" Chris asked sitting down in the seat she vacated.

"How do you know it was my fault!?" I exclaimed.

Chris held his hands up defensively.  "Calm down, man," he urged.  "I'm just trying to help."

I slammed my arms down on the table, then sighed and looked up at Chris sadly.  "I'm sorry," I said.  "I just don't really know what I did.  Apparently I look at your sister with 'goo-goo' eyes."

Chris smirked a little.  "You do still kind-of give her the 'goo-goo' eyes," he said.

"What does that even mean?!" I exclaimed throwing my hands up in the air.

Chris sighed.  "I think you know what that means," he said.  "But if you really want me to say it, it means you still look at her like you'd make out with her if only given the opportunity."

I wrinkled my face up.  "Really?"

Chris nodded.  "Yeah, really."

I sighed.  "I can't help it, I guess," I said.  "She's really hot."

Chris frowned.  "And your girlfriend isn't?"

"Of course she is," I quickly replied, "but can't more than one girl be hot?"

"Not when you have a girlfriend," Chris noted.

I stared at him for probably about a minute and then sighed and put my head down, realizing he was right.  "I didn't think Victoria would be the problem," I muttered.

"What was that?"

I looked back up and sighed again.  "Nothing," I said.  "I guess I'd better go apologize to Hannah."

Chris nodded.  "Yeah, that would probably be good," he said.  "I would just say that you should apologize because you want to, not because you feel like you have to."

As I stood, I reflected on that for a moment and then I looked down at Chris and asked out of genuine interest, "Why don't you have a girlfriend, Chris?  You'd be a lot better boyfriend than me."

Chris laughed nervously and then shrugged.  "I don't know," he said.  "I guess the right girl just hasn't come along yet."

I paced back and forth for several more minutes, making sure I was calm and trying to anticipate what Hannah would say so that I could avoid things getting heated again.  I finally decided I couldn't prepare for everything and after taking a deep breath, headed out the door.

When I knocked on Hannah's dorm room door, she answered almost immediately.  She didn't look all that angry any more, just sad.  "I'm sorry," I blurted out.

Hannah sighed.  "I'm sorry, too," she said, avoiding eye contact.  "I may have over reacted."

"No," I countered, "you have the right to be upset.  I shouldn't look at other girls that way, but even when I mess up and do, I want you to know that it doesn't mean anything.  I hope you know that I'm just a dumb boy doing dumb boy things."

Hannah gave a little laugh and looked up at me.  "I know," she said.  "I mean, my head knows that's true, but my heart... It just makes me question how you feel about me."

I reached out and took her hands.  "Hannah, I don't want you to ever question that again," I said.  "I'm so, so sorry and I hope to never look at anyone ever again except you because, well, because I love you."

I hoped it didn't sound too cheesy.  I really, truly meant it, and I had felt it for a while.  Hannah's face just lit up in the brightest smile I had ever seen.  "I love you, too!" she replied happily.

"Is your roommate around?" I asked, peering into the room since we were still basically standing in the hallway, where thankfully no one else was around at the time.

A little giggle and then, "No."

I smiled.  "Good."  Hannah let me step in, and I closed the door behind me.

I couldn't have been happier that our first fight was resolved so quickly and had such a happy ending.  I'd like to think that I stopped looking at Victoria "that way", too.  At least, Hannah never brought it up again.

A week and a half after our first fight, I had to endure something that wasn't as upsetting as the fight, but about which I thought and fretted quite a bit more.  I had to leave Daisy in the care of someone other than my mother.

Hannah and I were driving back home for Thanksgiving, but we decided it wasn't worth putting Daisy through the stress of riding in the car for hours to return home for just a few days and then come right back to her new home.  This worked out well because Chris and Victoria were staying at the college over Thanksgiving and Chris agreed to take care of Daisy.  I think I knew he would do fine, but I still felt compelled to do over all the information he needed about 8000 times.

It was after about the 93rd time of me going over the rules that Chris just laughed and said, "I think I get it, David.  I'm not going to let Daisy die.  I'll take great care of her.  We understand each other."  He held out his hand towards her and to confirm his statement, Daisy walked up to him and nuzzled his hand.

I smiled.  "Okay, okay," I said,  "I guess you're right."  But that didn't stop me from still thinking of about 800 other little things to mention over the next few hours.


We arranged to have Thanksgiving dinner with Hannah's parents on Friday and dinner with my mom and my family on Saturday.  My mom was working at her restaurant Thanksgiving day, serving a special dinner for those who didn't have homes or families of their own, and I had opted to help out with that.  Hannah wanted to help, too, but it was still a business and she didn't have a food handlers permit so they wouldn't let her do much.  They did let her serve as a hostess and seat people, which was better than nothing.

The Thanksgiving day event went well, but my mom kept glancing at me and acting like she wanted to tell me something but then just shaking her head when I asked what it was.

Hannah's family Thanksgiving went well and was a lot less mysterious.  I was a little nervous about meeting the rest of the family, but they were all really nice.  They did talk about horses a lot, but that was okay by me.

Then Saturday came around.  My mom was hosting Thanksgiving at her house.  My grandma and my aunts and uncles and cousins were all there.  Usually we didn't have quite this many people over for Thanksgiving, but my mom wanted to make it big this year.  After dinner, I found out why.

I remember sitting next to Hannah, picking at my pie because I was so stuffed I didn't think I could eat another bite no matter how delicious it was, and starting to wonder how Daisy was doing.  Then I heard a clanging on a water glass and looked up to see my mom standing with a big smile on her face.  Steve stood up beside her.  "We have an announcement to make," my mother called out after my family had settled down.  She glanced at Steve, gave a nod, and then they both said together, "We're engaged!"

My jaw hit the floor, figuratively speaking.  I had not seen that coming.  Even though my mom and Steve had been together for years now and I still liked him a lot, I had not thought about them actually getting married.  I mean, I was just a kid.  Marriage wasn't on my mind at all.  But now, it was real.  It was really happening for them.  My mom's sisters were standing and rushing over to her.  I was just sitting there starting, but then a smile started to spread across my face.  Hannah nudged me and whispered, "That's good news, right?"

I looked at her and gave a full on smile.  "Yes," I confirmed.  "It's very good news."  I couldn't help but feel a little proud since I had originally set them up, and also a little ashamed both that I hadn't foreseen this possibility and because I had been thinking about Daisy so much.  But my mom was more important to me than my cat, no matter how much I loved my cat, and once my aunts settled down a bit, I walked up to her to give her a big hug and to shake Steve's hand, which of course turned into a hug as well. 

Steve didn't call me "son" or anything lame like that.  He just said, "Thank you."  And I said, "You're welcome."  We both knew exactly what we meant.

The rest of that Saturday and on through the next morning was filled with my mom talking about how happy she was and me telling her I knew something was up at the restaurant on Thursday.  Hannah spent Sunday morning with her parents and then it was already time to hope in the car and say good-bye.

"I'll have some sort of official engagement party or something around Christmas time," my mom told me.  "I don't even know what people do for that anymore."

"I'm sure whatever you want to do will be fine, mom," I assured her.

"Thanks, David," she said.  "I love you."

I smiled.  "I love you, too, mom."  It was nice that I could say this to her now after all those years growing up and being a lame little kid who couldn't tell his mother I loved her.  I loved my mom.  I loved Hannah.  I loved Daisy.  Life was good.  "I'll see you for Christmas," I said.

My mom nodded.  "See you for Christmas," she said.  Life was good.

When we got back to my apartment near campus, it turned out that Daisy was just fine.  "She makes me consider getting a cat!" Chris told me with a smile.

I smiled back.  "I'm glad," I replied, "but just keep in mind, they aren't all as awesome as Daisy."

"They might not all be awesome like Daisy," Hannah chimed in, "but each animal is awesome in its own way."

I wrapped my arm around my girl and gave an affectionate squeeze when she said that.  This was exactly why she was so great.

After Hannah had gone back to her dorm room, I also shared the news with Chris about my mom getting engaged.  "That's pretty cool," Chris said.  He was silent for a moment and then, with a frown, he said, "I think my parents might be getting a divorce."

My heart sank.  I had never met Chris's parents, but I knew he didn't have the best relationship with them.  "What makes you say that?" I asked.

Chris shrugged.  "My mom called me on Friday to complain about how annoyed she was with dad."

"That's a weird thing to dump on your son."  I really was at a loss as to why anyone would do that to their kids.

Chris gave a half shrug.  "Well, I don't know.  I mean, she gets upset at him sometimes.  Maybe its just another time.  We'll have to wait and see."

I wanted to give Chris a hug, but he wasn't much of a hugger and, frankly, neither was I, so instead I just said, "Gee, that's tough man, I'm sorry."

"Thanks," Chris said.  Then he took a deep breath and managed to smile.  "So tell me all about your Thanksgivings," he said.  "Since my family sucks, its nice to live a little vicariously through you."

I laughed, a little uncomfortable, but I wanted to help cheer Chris up so I told him everything as Daisy walked over to us and also helped with the cheering up process by purring and nuzzling.

The next few weeks before Christmas break just seemed to drag on.  I kept thinking about my mom and Steve and how great it was that my matching of them had worked out and wondering when they would get married and if I would be a groomsman and if Hannah could be involved somehow, too.  I was really thankful for Hannah and her dedication to studying during that time.  It helped keep me as focused as I could be so that on my finals I got As where I might otherwise have gotten Bs and Bs where I might have otherwise gotten Cs.

Then we excitedly headed home again for Christmas, this time with Daisy going with us.  I was so happy.  I looked forward to a great Christmas break and I wasn't disappointed.

I don't want to dwell on it all too much because it probably isn't as exciting to you as it was to me, but my mom's co-workers but together a great engagement party for her and Steve.  I even got to meet some of Steve's co-workers from the clinic where he worked.  They loved animals nearly as much as Steve and me and Hannah so it was great to talk to them.  It turned out Hannah knew a couple of them because they had once worked at the vet office where her dad was a vet.  I was curious about why they had left that office, but I knew better than to ask and they seemed friendly with Hannah and she was friendly with everyone so it all seemed fine.

My mom was just so happy.  I thought back to how sad she had been when she heard that dad had died and this was like a complete 180.  It just made me so happy to see her happy, and I couldn't ask for her to be marrying a better guy.  I did think once or twice during that break that maybe I shouldn't be so happy, maybe I should feel like my mom was betraying my dad by getting remarried or something.  But I just couldn't feel that way.  I knew my mom had loved my dad very much, but I never knew him well enough to feel my own personal connection.  I felt a much strong connection to Steve, and that was why I was glad he was marrying my mom.

It seemed like no time before our long three week break was over and it was time to head back to school.  I gave both my mom and Steve big hugs.  (I could be a hugger when it came to them.)  It wasn't until we were on the road that I realized I hadn't seen or talked to Chelsea at all during break.  I hoped she was okay, and figured I would have heard about it if she wasn't, but still I resolved to send her a text or message or something to apologize when I got back to campus.  That was my intention anyway.  When I actually did get back to my apartment, I was met by Chris telling me that maybe his family wasn't so bad after all and that he had had the best Christmas he'd had in a long time.  I was happy for him and genuinely wanted to hear his story.  I'm sorry to say I forgot all about my concerns for Chelsea.


Another exciting happening during that next semester was Hannah's decision to take the photography class I had encouraged her to take.  I was actually a little nervous about it.  I really hoped she liked it.  I didn't want my advice to end up being terrible.  It turned out I had nothing to worry about.  Hannah was a natural at photography, but she loved the class because it showed her how to make her photos even better.  She was thrilled when she got an A- with advice for improvement and she took it all to heart, though she didn't follow every little bit of it.  Her careful selectively of which advice to follow and which to ignore earned her an A+ on her final project and a solid A overall.  I think she was happier about that A than she was about the As in all of her "real" classes.

I also convinced Hannah to play on a coed intramural soccer team with me.  This time I was a little nervous because Hannah had never seen me play soccer before and though I had told her I was a pretty good goalie, I really had not kept up my skills at all.  The first game, I let the other team score two goals on me, and even though I blocked dozens of other goals, I was pretty ashamed.  "It's okay," Hannah told me when I got all down on myself afterwards.  "You don't need to impress me with soccer.  I'm already impressed with who you are as a person."

Even though Hannah said she didn't care, I put my whole heart into my intramurals.  By the end of the season, no one could score on me and some people asked me why I didn't play on the "real" soccer team.  I shrugged and said, "I think those days of serious soccer are behind me.  But I'll still play soccer for fun."

All in all it was a great semester and when we started talking about our housing arrangements for the next year, we came up with an awesome plan for me and Chris and Hannah and a couple of Hannah's friends and one of Chris's friends who lived across the hall to all move into a house together.  There would be six of us all together:  three boys and three girls.  Chris and the other guy (Harvey) would share a room.  Hannah's friends Sarah and Tracy would share a room, and the third room would go to me and Hannah.  I couldn't wait.  And the greatest part of all was that since Hannah and I lived in the same city, I wouldn't have to wait the whole summer to see her again!  For the first part of the summer, Hannah was going to her grandparent's farm, but I would be able to go out there and visit her once or twice and she would be back in town after about a month.


When I got back to my house that summer, after dropping Hannah off at her parents' place, I was surprised to see Chelsea walking down the street with a new dog I didn't recognize.  I remembered that I hadn't talked to Chelsea in about 8 months and suddenly felt really bad.  I quickly debated whether I should grab Daisy's carrier and run in the house or walk up to Chelsea and say hello, but I didn't make my decision fast enough and Chelsea ended up seeing me first.  I was afraid she was going to angry at me, but she smiled as she walked up to me.  "Hey, David," she said as the dog she was walking ran up to me and she followed behind pulling on the leash.  "Did you just get back?"

"Yeah," I replied, rubbing the back of my neck and feeling a little awkward.  "Daisy's in the car and I should probably get her inside."

"Oh, okay," Chelsea said, still smiling, "but before you go, I'd like you to meet Lady."

I looked down at the dog who was sniffing around my feet and thankfully hadn't noticed the cat in the car.  I reached down to pet her, and Lady sniffed at my hand curiously.  "She seems nice," I said.  "When did you get her?"

"Well, my parents got her," Chelsea said.  "Turns out they miss Lily even more than I did."  Her voice didn't get any sadder.  "I think I might get a dog of my own, but not until after I graduate.  Anyway," she gave a shrug, "I should get on with her walk.  I'll talk to my parents about having you over for dinner sometime so we can catch up.  Hannah can come too if you like."

I felt my face grow a little hotter in embarrassment that she knew and remembered my girlfriend's name, though later I wondered if it was just because she saw posts about us on Facebook.  "Okay, that would be nice," I said.

Chelsea gave a nod and then headed back towards the sidewalk.  "Okay then," she called over her shoulder.  "Don't be a stranger."

I gave a weak wave, trying to decide what to make of that whole exchange.  Chelsea didn't seem upset at all that I had basically ignored her that entire school year.  She was probably busy and had made new friends, which was good for her, but I still felt bad.  I couldn't help but remember her words from just two short years ago, that I would forget all about her.  It was starting to seem like I had, but as I picked up Daisy's carrier out of the car, I decided that I would leave it up to Chelsea to determine how much of my friend she still wanted to be.

It was four days later when a knock came at my mom's door.  Hannah was over, spending some time with me before she left for her grandparent's farm in a couple days, and we were watching a movie on DVD.  I glanced out the window, saw it was Chelsea, gave a bit of a confused look, and then went to answer the door.

"Why didn't you ring the bell?" I asked as soon as I opened the door, perhaps a bit too quickly.

Chelsea looked surprised.  "The lights were off so I wasn't certain anyone was home or awake."

"It's 3pm," I informed her, as if she didn't already know.  "Who would be asleep?"  I don't know why I was getting so rude with her.  Maybe because she had interrupted the cuddling Hannah and I had been doing on the couch?

Chelsea sighed.  She seemed a bit frustrated.  "Taking naps in the afternoon is not that uncommon, David.  Anyway, I just came to invite you to dinner sometime, but I'm guessing you don't really want to come over."

She turned to walk away and I called out, "Chelsea, wait!"  She turned back and looked at me with a look of exasperation with her hands on her hips.  "I'm sorry," I said, "for everything.  I'd love to have dinner with you and your family.  I'll talk to Hannah and see if we can come over in the next few days.  She's leaving this weekend to see her grandparents."

Chelsea gave a curt nod.  "Okay then," she said, "that's all I was looking for."  I wasn't sure if she meant the apology or the acceptance of the dinner invite, but I wasn't about to ask so I just nodded back and closed the door behind her.

"What was that all about?" Hannah asked when I got back to the couch where she was petting a very content Daisy.

I sighed as I plopped down on the couch, causing Daisy to open her eyes and try to figure out what was going on.  I reached over and petted her by way of apology and she closed her eyes again.  "It was Chelsea," I said, "she just wanted to invite us to dinner."

"Yes, I heard that much," Hannah confirmed.  "Why were you so rude to her?"

I wanted to protest that I wasn't rude, but as soon as I opened my mouth I knew that I had been.  "She interrupted us," I claimed.

Hannah eyed me critically.  "We've been interrupted before," she said.

I sighed and closed my eyes for a moment.  When I opened them, I decided to tell Hannah everything, though without looking at her because I feared that would be too difficult.  "I used to be close to Chelsea," I said, "like best friends close.  In fact.." I took a deep breath before continuing, "we kind-of had crushes on each other growing up, though it seemed like they never coincided so we never dated or anything and now," my voice got quicker as I went on, "I only want to be with you, I promise.  But because Chelsea and I were still good friends a few years ago, I feel kind-of bad that I've let that slip, but at the same time, I want to make sure I always put you first."  I sighed again and turned to look at her.  I was surprised to see she was smiling her soft, compassionate smile, but I still asked, "Was that too much to tell you?"

Hannah shook her head.  "No, not at all," she said.  "It's possible you should have told me sooner, but it can be difficult to talk about old crushes or old significant others and sometimes it is best not to say anything."  She paused for a moment.  "I think because Chelsea is an important part of your life" (I noted that she said "is" and not "was") "and things have been odd with you and her, it was good to bring this up.  And I have to say, I'm very sorry for whatever part I played in pulling the two of you apart."

"Oh no, Hannah," I quickly jumped in, reaching out for her and running her fingers through her hair.  "None of this is your fault.  I just, I was afraid, I mean, I thought..."

Hannah's smile widened.  "You were afraid I would react like I did with Victoria."

Ashamed, I nodded.

"I've learned a lot since then," Hannah said.  "Plus, I remember the way you looked at Chelsea when you introduced me to her.  It wasn't with the eyes of passion or desire.  It was with the kind of love a brother would have for his sister, and I think that's great."

I managed to smile and almost felt like I was going to cry.  Hannah was just so perfect.  "I love you, Hannah," I said.

She smiled.  "I love you, too."  And we kissed, right there on the couch, with Daisy still purring away between us.


We arranged to have dinner with Chelsea's family on Thursday evening.  My mom and Steve, Hannah and I all came over.  Roger was there, too, along with Chelsea and their younger siblings and their parents.  The older kids were completely off on their own now and only came home to visit on special occasions.  Their uncle also had moved out and gotten a place of his own.  Apparently he had gotten married a few months ago.  I hadn't even known he was dating anyone.  I felt a little bad about no knowing what was going on, but I hadn't really known him as well as Chelsea and Roger, so I decided to not feel bad about him and focus more on them.

There was a lot of talking over dinner.  Roger was playing on the official soccer team at his college and doing quite well.  He was looking forward to his senior year.  He thought they might finally take home a nice big championship trophy.  Chelsea loved her studies and, with a glance at her parents, had to admit that living in the dorms instead of at home had been a good decision.  She met lots of new friends and even a new boyfriend, though they had broken up about a month before second semester finals.  She said that was fine.  It had been fun while it lasted and her parents probably wouldn't have liked him anyway.  Chelsea's mom protested that, but Chelsea just laughed and said she was teasing and that they might still meet the guy because they were still friends even though he was thinking about now dating her roommate from last year.

Steve and my mom talked about their engagement and wedding plans.  They hadn't set a date yet, but they were going to get married here in down and they wanted to make sure everyone around the table could attend.  Chelsea seemed very happy to be included and she shot me a brief glance that I imagined to say, "See, your mom doesn't forget about me" but I can't say for sure if that was real or imagined because I noticed it for less than a second.

Then Hannah and I got to talk about our time at school.  Hannah raved about the photography class she was taking and Chelsea perked up and asked if Hannah could take a picture of her with Lady.  Chelsea said she'd love to, but she didn't have her camera with her (she had purchased a pretty nice camera during the course of the course) so if Chelsea wanted it now, it would have to be done with a smart phone.  Chelsea said that would be just fine.

I talked a bit about my classes and the intramural sports, but I have to admit, I didn't feel like my stuff was nearly as exciting as what everyone else had had to say.  But then, Chelsea saved me by asking how Daisy had liked college life and I got to talk about all the cute things she had done an how much everyone loved her and that took about ten or fifteen minutes to go through.  It was possible I was boring some people at the table, but half of the folks there (Chelsea, Hannah, myself, and Steve) absolutely adored animals at at least one more (my mom) absolutely adored Daisy, so I figured the others could just deal with it.

We finished up the meal with apple pie and ice cream for desert and by the time it was time to go I was feeling really good about things.  I even, after exchanging a look with Hannah and getting a permissive nod, gave Chelsea a hug and told her I would try to keep in touch better.  "I'll try, too," she said, "but don't feel bad if it doesn't happen like it used to."

I smiled and could think of nothing else to say.  Chelsea had grown up a lot over the past two years, it seemed.  Maybe she was the one who was going to forget all about me now.  That seemed a little sad, but then I looked over at Hannah, smiling and reaching out her hand for me, a hand which I gladly took, and I decided that whatever happened would be okay.


That summer and the whole next year at school went by in a blur.  It seemed like there was so much going on but I can't for the life of me remember all the details.  Living in the house with Hannah and our other friends was beyond amazing.  We had game nights and dinners and movie nights.  I learned to cook  better than I had before, which made my mother pretty proud when I told her.  Perhaps the most exciting thing that happened, though, was not at school but back at home where my mom and Steve set their wedding date for that following summer.  And to top it all off, my mom had noticed some of the awesome photos Hannah had been posting on Facebook and asked me if I thought Hannah would be willing to photograph their wedding.

"We'd pay her," my mom said, "and she shouldn't feel obligated.  I just thought she might like to be involved.  And we don't need lots of photos, just a few."

"I think that sounds great, mom," I said over the phone.  "I'll talk to Hannah about it."  Hannah was sitting right there and her ears perked up at the sound of her name.  When I relayed the message, her face lit up in a smile and she happily agreed.

The only sad part of the wedding was that I wasn't asked to be a groomsman.  It turned out Steve had his own friends his own age.  But I was asked to do a reading at the ceremony, so that was pretty exciting.  I think I actually might have been more excited about the ceremony than my mom and Steve were.  They both had been married before and though they wanted something nice for their union, they weren't expecting droves of doves or super fancy dresses or lots of flowers or even a huge meal.  My mom got a pastry chef she knew from work to do the cake and she helped prepare the wedding meal though she certainly didn't do all of the work.  She planned it all out like the head chef that she was.

When the big day arrived, everything went without a hitch.  My mom was wearing a simple white dress, but I thought she looked quite pretty, and Hannah agreed.  Chelsea and Roger and their parents were all in attendance, as were some of Steve's friends from work and some of my mom's friends from her restaurant and a couple others they had each met.  Of course my family was all there.  Steve's brother was a groomsman, but he didn't have much else in way of family.  Overall, I think there were about 40 people in attendance.

It was a nice ceremony and the reception was fun, though there was one awkward moment, I thought, where Chelsea asked if she could dance with me.  I wasn't sure why she would do that, but Hannah didn't seem at all threatened and so I went with it.  I soon found out what was on Chelsea's mind.  "I just wanted to let you know that I met someone," she said almost immediately after we were out on the floor.

I couldn't help but laugh.  "You're always meeting someone, Chelsea," I said.

She blushed rather prettily and said, "Yeah, I know, but I think this one might end up being pretty serious."

"What makes you say that?" I asked.

She glanced down and mumbled so I could hardly hear, but I caught, "you and Hannah."

"What was that?" I prompted.

She raised her head up and said, "Our relationship makes me think of the one between you and Hannah."

I was caught a bit off guard by that.  "So you're saying your relationship is serious because it reminds you of the serious one Hannah and I have?"

She nodded.

"What makes you think my relationship with Hannah is more serious that any one I've had so far?" I asked.  I was genuinely curious.  I did think my relationship with Hannah was more serious, but I hadn't talked to Chelsea about it so how would she know?

"I don't know for sure," Chelsea admitted, "but you just seem... I don't know... so happy with her.  Even just when you were dancing with her before.  It just seems like a more mature relationship."

"And you think you've found the same thing?" I asked.

Chelsea blushed.  "I sure hope so," she said.

We danced for a second longer and then I asked, "Why are you telling me this?"

She sighed and looked a little embarrassed.  "I just wanted to make sure I was right..." she said.

"Right about what?"

"About you and Hannah," she said.

I nodded.  "Yes, I would say you are."

She nodded back.  "Good then," she said, "because I think this might be our last chance."

"Our last chance for what?"

The song was drawing to a close so she just said, "You know what."

I had to admit to myself that I was pretty sure I did.  Chelsea was asking me, one last time, and in some ways for the first time, if I might be in love with her.  I didn't want to be so blatant, so I just said, "I'm happy with Hannah, Chell.  You and I are friends, but she's the one I'll love."

Chelsea frowned just a little and said, "Well even though I think this new guy might be 'the one', I'll still always love you, too."

I sighed.  "Yes, well, you know what I meant."

She nodded and smiled.  "Yes, I did.  I just want to make sure you know that I can be in love with someone else and still love you, you know, like a brother or whatever."

I smiled.  "Yes, I feel the same way."

"Well good."

"Good."

"You should get back to Hannah," Chelsea said, releasing me as I realized that the music had stopped about a second ago.

I felt my face grow slightly red.  "Oh, yeah, you're probably right," I said.

She smiled and leaned over and kissed me lightly on the cheek.  "Good-bye, David," she said.

"Good-bye," I replied, though it didn't fully hit me at the time why we were saying good-bye.

I walked back over to Hannah and she looked a little confused, but not angry.  "What was that about?" she asked.

"Chelsea met someone and wanted to make sure I knew," I said.

Hannah laughed.  "You know, I think that girl might be in love with you after all," she said.  Then she got more serious and said, "I just hope you don't return those feelings."

I shook my head.  "You don't have to worry about that.  Chelsea and I might always be friends..."

"Which is fine by me!" Hannah interrupted perhaps a bit too quickly.

I smiled and turned to face her, grasping her shoulders tenderly in my hands, "But you are the one I love."

Hannah smiled.  "I love you, too," she said.  With that, we went back out on the dance floor and it wasn't until nearly an hour later that I even noticed that Chelsea was gone.


After the wedding, Steve and my mom went on their honeymoon and Hannah and I hung around their house to keep plants watered and Steve's birds and guinea pigs fed and all that.  Daisy was intrigued by these creatures, by the way, but fortunately she didn't try to attack any of them.  She just sat and stared at them until she fell asleep.

"She's so funny," Hannah said.  "I love it."

"And I love you," I told her, leaning over and kissing her.

Hannah laughed.  "You're so weird sometimes," she said, but there was a big smile on her face.

While house sitting with Hannah, I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to live together, just the two of us.  The next year at school, my senior year and Hannah's junior year, we were still living in a house with other people, which would be great just like it had for the past two years, but I couldn't help but think what it would be like when we were both done with school and I could, well, ask Hannah to marry me.

I wasn't going to pop the question any time soon.  Hannah and I hadn't talked about marriage and I didn't want to even think about it in earnest until she was done with school, which would still be a while since she had to go on to extra schooling after she graduated in order to become a vet.  I had settled for just being a veterinary technician like Steve and would have all the diplomas I needed after this next year.  As much as watching my mom get married made me anxious about my future with Hannah, I knew we'd both want to focus on finishing up all of our schooling first.


I have to admit that my senior year wasn't quite as laid back as I had been hoping for.  The first semester was fine, but for the second semester I had to study to pass an extra exam so I could be qualified as a veterinary technician when I graduated.  Plus, I started applying for jobs so I could have something lined up when I graduated.  I wanted to get a job as close to the college as I could, since I wanted to be near Hannah as she completed her schooling over the next few years, but my top choice didn't have any openings, so I had to go a bit further away.  I applied at a few different places, and even at the humane society back home where I had met Steve, but was fortunate to get an offer from my second choice, pending me passing my exam.

I studied like crazy and Hannah quizzed me on all the stuff I needed to know.  She was amazing so she pretty much learned it all herself just from helping me study, which helped her in some of her own classes, so it really was a win-win.  I felt like we made a great team and I started hoping that maybe once she graduated we could work together.

For that to happen, I first had to pass my exam, though, which I was proud to do with flying colors.

Then it was graduation time.  My mom and Steve and one of my aunts came out to see me graduate.  I had invited Chelsea, but she declined saying she had a graduation of her own to attend.  Roger came, though.  He had graduated the year before and was working several hundred miles away, but he was in the area on his way to visit his family anyway.  It was weird to me that Roger could come from a much greater distance than Chelsea to see me graduate, but I guess it wasn't that much further since my school, now my alma mater, was between my home town and where Roger now lived.  It was more or less on his way home anyway.

The graduation ceremony was pretty boring, but we went out to my favorite restaurant in the area (I have to specify that because my mom's restaurant was my favorite over all) and had a great time.  My friends from college, a friend from high school (Roger), and my family all seemed to get along just fine.  It made me happy.  I thought back on the past several years, trying to remember all the way back to when I had been a young child to whom my mother had just brought a new kitten I named Daisy.  I was happy with where I had gone and what I had become, especially with an amazing girl like Hannah by my side.

Afterwards, I pulled my mom aside and said, "Thanks."

"For what, sweetie?" she asked.

"For being a great mom," I said.

She looked like she was about to cry.  She didn't say anything, just gave me a big hug.  I thought about how that probably would have embarrassed me back in high school and I happily hugged her back.